Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Uh c'mon people I AM PREGNANT HERE! Think of me too!

My family is being really rude, or so I think. I am pregnant with my first after years of being told I was infertile. Unfortunately, I found out I was pregnant the day that my twin nieces were stillborn at 22 weeks. These were my brothers children and we are all still grieving. Some more than others.

Well it has been six months since and my family is still focusing their attention and resources on my brothers girlfriend and the twins. There is even a huge monument built in my parents back yard as a memorial. Uh... I do think that the memorial is a little odd but hey... it is not all about me right?

I think I have been pretty good about things but I am feeling really left out. Obviously I can't say anything because I would be a "bitch" but um... I am starting to feel really neglected. I am not even allowed to talk about my pregnancy.

How should I handle this?

Answer Question

Asked by girlneffy at 4:38 PM on Oct. 28, 2008 in Relationships

Level 3 (27 Credits)
Answers (9)
  • didnt you just post a question saying that you get treated really well by family but cant stand it anymore and dont want to sound bitchy????

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:40 PM on Oct. 28, 2008

  • Yep I did but I said I am surrounded by people that love and care for me. My family lives a few hours away. They are not around me.

    I was referring to the people I am with all the time, my BF, his parents, my friends....

    Hell, my family won't even let me talk about it.

    Answer by girlneffy at 4:42 PM on Oct. 28, 2008

  • I should add, I don't want to be babied but acknowledged would be nice.

    Answer by girlneffy at 4:44 PM on Oct. 28, 2008

  • oh okay, i was just wondering.. :( my family does that too... i hate it.


    Answer by Anonymous at 4:47 PM on Oct. 28, 2008

  • That is really touchy - BTW -- I am very sorry for your family.
    However, just keep your head up. Things might change once the baby is actually here.

    Answer by isaboo22 at 5:45 PM on Oct. 28, 2008

  • Your baby will be their grandchild, why should ur brothers girl and ur family still be talking about it after 6mths? You will be bringing in a baby and basically it will be like a replacement. My husbands mother died last year at age 49 and I was actually like 10-11weeks pregnant. So I told my husband me getting pregnant might have been something that was supposed to happen to help u with ur loss. She got to see one ultrasound when I was 10-11 weeks pregnant. Then she died like 2 weeks later. My husband has a 12yr old daughter he never gets to see since she was 5yrs old. My husband's mom was always upset that she never got to spend time with her. So now I was havin a girl and she never got to meet her. Both my kids have red hair like her too. Your child should matter and you should be able to share ultrasounds and things that happen with the baby with ur mom or family.

    Answer by Anonymous at 5:48 PM on Oct. 28, 2008

  • That would irritate me, but unfortunatley I don't have any advice for you. I'm really sorry! If it were my family, only because I know my family and how things are with them, I would talk to my mom about it privately. My mom has a way of telling everyone what's up without making me feel embarrassed or like I'm a "bitch".

    Answer by feesharose at 6:50 PM on Oct. 28, 2008

  • i understand. My bf's cousin had a miscarriage. she had just found out she was pregnant. No one even knew. Well when his mother is in town se always take us out to dinner well she was in town this weekendand we weren't invited because they didnt want to upset her cause i am far along pregnant and we have a a 10m old.
    I understand i have been through that. but she cant stay away from us forever and they are saying that she isnt even going to come to my baby shower.

    Answer by Anonymous at 6:53 PM on Oct. 28, 2008

  • some people can't get over a loss like this and although you have every right to feel the way you do i would just continue to wait and see what happens. it sucks that they can't get over it. i'm sure that when the baby is here they will be thrilled.

    Answer by melody77 at 7:20 PM on Oct. 28, 2008

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.