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How do I say this to my sister without her getting mad?

I don't want to start a fight with her but she lives 1 block away from my house. Her daughter is a cheerleader. She is to lazy to clean up her own yard so everyday she walks down to my yard so her daughter can practice doing her flips. I feel like I have lost privacy because I won't even know shes there and she'll be sitting on my front porch, I know she can hear our conversations. She is also wearing spots on the grass wear her daughter has been doing the reapeated flips everyday. I have mentioned this and she argued and said it was already like that. I work very hard on my yard and don't want bald spots. She says she has to many trees to do flips in her yard but she has done them there before. She just simply needs to clean up the sticks and stuff that fell to the ground (basic yardwork.) She is very overdramatic and I hate dealing with confrontation. I feel like I am being taking advantage of because I live so close. Help!


Asked by Anonymous at 9:49 PM on Oct. 19, 2010 in Relationships

This question is closed.
Answers (12)
  • No matter how you tell your sister,she going to be upset. Why should you keep holding back how you feel She's using your yard like it's her yard.The same energy she use to walk to your house. Is the same energy she can use to clean her yard . Her daughter should help clean the yard up too. After all she's the one doing flips. If she gets mad then you won't have to worry about her making anymore bald spots in your yard. Good Luck.

    Answer by TwannaB. at 12:23 AM on Oct. 20, 2010

  • People only take advantage of you if you let them. If it is bothering you, you need to speak up in a respectful way, just like how you would like to be treated. Because she is you sister and has known you a long time, she probably knows you hate confrontation, like you said. Put those big girl pants on and stand up for yourself. As my parents taught me, if you don't look after yourself, no one will!

    Answer by HeatheranninSP at 10:11 PM on Oct. 19, 2010

  • the only way I see is to confront her and say you need to clean up your yard so your kids can play in their own yard...Or give the daughter $20 to clean it..

    Answer by chica679 at 9:53 PM on Oct. 19, 2010

  • Life is short, family is important, grass is not. She is your neice, do it for her, not for your sister.

    Answer by gramsmom at 10:19 PM on Oct. 19, 2010

  • I personally don't think the whole yard thing is a big deal as far as spots . But i would ask her to call you before hand and ask if she can come down. Offer to help her with her yard since you seem to like to do it, that way hers will get clean and her daughter can practice there instead of your house.

    Answer by Keyonsmom at 9:53 PM on Oct. 19, 2010

  • She doesn't even let you know she there? Wow! I would just tell her she needs to clean up her yard and if she gets mad oh well. She might be your sister but you shouldn't have to put up with that crap.

    Answer by jnd951999 at 9:59 PM on Oct. 19, 2010

  • Just remember that when your neice is grown you can share stories on how she did so many flips in your front lawn that it wore holes in it. It's actually kinda cute. I say let her do it as she will be grown soon and this way you get to be involved in her daily life someting many Aunts are not privy to.

    Answer by mom2priceboys at 10:07 PM on Oct. 19, 2010

  • I would personally tell her straight forward that I dont want her and my niece in my yard. That you work hard to keep it clean and bald free. That since they have the time to walk down to your house, that time spent they could of been clearing up their yard so she could practice her routine. Its not that hard to clean up your yard. I know for fact. But if she doesnt want to do it tell her to post around the neighbor hood and maybe some young kids whose looking to make a couple bucks could clean the yard for her and that way they can practice there. and watch what u say you never know if they are just being nosy and wanting to listen in on ur conversations.

    Answer by mybeautybabes at 10:23 PM on Oct. 19, 2010

  • Well the way I see it is this... if she wants to get upset at you she's gonna get upset at you. So the best thing to do (in my opinion) is to decide how important it is to you if she gets upset. If you don't mind then say what you feel. It's not so much the words you use as much as HOW you say them. But again, some people will get upset no matter what. Good luck to you

    And for the record... I 100% disagree with tootoobusy.

    Answer by firenicecream at 10:03 PM on Oct. 19, 2010

  • tell her that she cant just come over when she wants...let her be mad... its your house and yard.. she cant just show up whenever and its its disrespectful for her to do so

    Answer by Ross2010 at 10:51 PM on Oct. 19, 2010