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just wondering

ok please no bashing ive seen how mean some can get on here but im new to this site and i was wondering if anyoe else feels this way . i had a baby back in high school and of course the dad left me ran out and ruined my name in our town everyone calleed me the whorre and bs like that even tho he was the only one i had ever been with . anyways i am married now and im pregnant with my second but his first and i dont know how to let him do eveerything he says i should not have to handle anything

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 8:43 PM on Oct. 28, 2008 in Pregnancy

Answers (4)
  • that he is the one that is supposed to make sure im happy and everything is taken care of he feels so bad if i have to get up for something (im on bedrest) but it is so hard to let him do it my whole life i have done everything always on my own even my first pregnancy and raising my son it is just so hard to relize that i actually have someone here now that isnt going anywhere . does anyone else feel that way ? does it get easier ? i love him so much and i want him to feel like he is actually helping but its hard to do . any advice?
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:43 PM on Oct. 28, 2008

  • Under normal circumstances I would give you different advice. But since you are on bedrest, try to think of it as your JOB right now to do nothing. I think I would seriously lose my mind if I had to be on bedrest for any length of time. It's not easy to give up control at that level. But it is your job right now to stay put, to rest, to let that baby grow and get ready for birth. And it's okay to tell him how hard it is for you to accept being dependant right now, that you have always been a very independant person, and so it is just really difficult for you to be happy with this situation. Sometimes just letting your feelings out in the open can make a tough situation more bearable.
    BlueFrogMama

    Answer by BlueFrogMama at 8:49 PM on Oct. 28, 2008

  • Instead of viewing his acts of service to you as a burden on him view them as your way of allowing him to show his love. Its kind of like he gave you a gorgeous ring and you said no thanks I dont want it. He is trying to protect you and his baby and you NEED to let him do it or he will feel rejected (and you will have some serious health issues on your hands) just bite your lip and prmoise yourself to repay the avor. It makes it easier
    humaniterian87

    Answer by humaniterian87 at 1:39 AM on Oct. 29, 2008

  • you're not used of someone doing nice jestures for you..he just loves you and wants to make sure you're ok and happy, bed rest or not..it was weird for me too when i had a good guy come around and really do things for me to be nice..be thankful and if he feels he needs to do something you dont, let him. its kinda scary when you finally find someone whos treating you how youre suposed to be treated..like you landed on mars or something.
    tnteaton

    Answer by tnteaton at 2:43 AM on Oct. 29, 2008

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