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2 Bumps

Feeling inadequate adult content

For the past few years I've felt that I can't completely satisfy my husband. I'm rarely in the mood, and when we have sex I tend to be "lazy" and not very into it. So as we're doing the deed, I tell myself over and over to get more involved in the act, that I need to do it for him, etc... To the point that by the time it is over I am so frustrated with myself and I'm actually thankful that it's over with. I get envious of the ladies with a high sex drive, and prefer not to be involved in sexual jokes or conversation.
Last night I found his "Pocket P*ssy" in the shower. (He got it as a gag gift for his Bachelor party) Apparently while he was home alone that day he took matters into his own hands (literally lol). So when I discover his secret, I wasn't angry with him, but humiliated and extremely disappointed in myself. I threw the thing in the trash, because I never want to see it again.
WTF is wrong with me?????

Answer Question
 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 5:17 PM on Oct. 20, 2010 in Relationships

Answers (7)
  • Aw, don't get down on yourself. A lot of times after having kids the drive just isn't there. And really, can anyone blame ya?!?! It may be hormonal, maybe check in w/your doctor....see what he/she has to say & maybe there is something you can do or take to help improve your drive. Don't beat yourself up though.
    cheekycherub

    Answer by cheekycherub at 5:19 PM on Oct. 20, 2010

  • I would rather find out my DH wah jacking off. Then having an affair.
    louise2

    Answer by louise2 at 5:19 PM on Oct. 20, 2010

  • Well, just because he masturbates (with or without toys) isn't a reflection on you! Trust me, ALL men masturbate, even those who get plenty of sex... I have a much higher sex drive than my fiance, and I know he still masturbates. Has he ever said anything about not being satisfied to you? Could it be possible that it's all just in your mind? Personally, I'd bring it up to him (in a non-accusatory way, of course)... Work on it TOGETHER, maybe more foreplay would get you in the mood more... And honestly, get yourself a vibrator! Masturbation will teach you what feels good for you, and in turn you can have him do the same thing to you.
    Anouck

    Answer by Anouck at 5:20 PM on Oct. 20, 2010

  • Alot of women do not have any interest in sex. Including me. I just put on a front like I am all into it. I don't do it any more than I have to though. So I know how you feel. Good luck
    arenad

    Answer by arenad at 5:20 PM on Oct. 20, 2010

  • I'm sorry to hear that. I agree with the others, check with the doctor to see if it could be hormonal and maybe they can give you something that would help and definitely talk to your husband because maybe he's not feeling unsatisfied, like the others said, just because he's masturbating doesn't mean he's unhappy with what you're giving him. ALL guys do it, whether they will admit it or not. I even tease mine, because I know he's on here surfing porn while I'm asleep (It's not a secret he has to keep from me, sometimes we surf it together. I tease him that I want to wake up and catch him playing. It's like a fantasy of mine) and he always says that just because he's looking at stuff on here doesn't mean he's j/o but I tell him maybe not EVERY time, but I'm sure some of the time LOL. Good luck with getting through this!
    KimPippin

    Answer by KimPippin at 5:52 PM on Oct. 20, 2010

  • Masturbating will increase your drive. I cum everyday with or without him and it keeps my sex drive in high gear all the time. Read online about masturbating, you'll learn a lot.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 6:29 PM on Oct. 20, 2010

  • I wouldn't jump to think an affair because you found his sex toy. I get sex reguarly and still take care of myself too. It's good he had a toy and not a real person I think. Maybe see if you can talk to him about watching him do it and then get into it with him and talk to your doctor about the lower libido...it's a real issue and there are reasons behind it and he/she can help you find it and how to help you.
    rio_burb

    Answer by rio_burb at 10:40 PM on Oct. 20, 2010

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