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2 Bumps

contin.. from yesterdays "will i ever understand him?"

ok, so i want to have him write pros and cons to our relationship. to see what he thinks. But im 99% sure he wont go for it. He tells me that there is nothing going on and he just talks to her like he would our roomate.. ok fine i can see that. but you dont tell a girl that u really missed her face :*( I hate snooping. but i feel at the moment like telling him im leaving. yet im having doubts. I dont know what to do. i feel like im damned if i do, damned if i dont. tried talkin last night about it upsetting me he gonna chilll with her and stuff. he told me that he sees where the conversation is going, im just jealous and he rolled over and went to sleep. should i leave?! few days?for good? tired of walkin on eggshells. i need to grow a back bone. i hate fighting with mself. i just dont know . i love him, says he loves me, but i feel texts are ruining us

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mommyoftristan

Asked by mommyoftristan at 9:05 AM on Oct. 21, 2010 in Relationships

Level 16 (2,903 Credits)
Answers (6)
  • prt 1 My boyfriend and a very big flirt. He cant really control it. He has a great sense of humor and so on. Everyone loves him. But our relationship history has not been the greatest, engaged to split to back together, now pregnant with his child. after 3 years lol. he has a history or having provactive conversations with women. And I admit I have snooped to find out this information, which was very very wrong of me to do. I know. I go looking for something I will find that. but I just find it sad that the topic that was talked about was our sex life, saying that he is bored and its not that its lack of its just he dont want it. and he asked her if she wearing thong and so on. how do i take that? My brother says let it go, he a guy stressed cause he going to be a dad and just like him my bf is a flirt. but why when asked if he is bored and if he talks to it to ppl he says NO?! is it just a guy thing? should i let it go?
    mommyoftristan

    Comment by mommyoftristan (original poster) at 9:07 AM on Oct. 21, 2010

  • You could leave for a few days. that might make him realize how hard this is for you. Some guys though (like my guy friend Tracy) will say that kind of stuff to even ugly women that he is not attracted to, because he LOVES the attention. Is this something your BF might do? Some guys just want their ego enflated by a girl, even if they dont "want" her. It's still not OK though.
    samurai_chica

    Answer by samurai_chica at 9:09 AM on Oct. 21, 2010

  • I'm a snoop too...I would rather snoop & know what's going on than not snoop & be taken for a fool.
    samurai_chica

    Answer by samurai_chica at 9:10 AM on Oct. 21, 2010

  • exactly. dont lie to me ya know.. its like he gets all defensive when i bring it up.. im like you know how i feel about you two hanging alone.. but shes not ugly, shes perky, FUN.. more then me, funny, his dog loves her so on.. there is like 5% jealousy... I just dont know. im thinking of moving to NH.. he says its harmless. but i cant stop thinking about how i feel its not
    mommyoftristan

    Comment by mommyoftristan (original poster) at 9:14 AM on Oct. 21, 2010

  • Wow! My husband and I are going through something similar and I had to ask him which is more important... a friendship with this person or your wife? If he loves you then he needs to respect how you feel about something. My husband picked his wife, and has stopped communication with this other woman. I know where it was headed, I'm not an idiot, and we're going to counseling for everything that's been going on. It sounds like you're down to giving him two options her or you. Good luck.
    marine_wife0520

    Answer by marine_wife0520 at 9:24 AM on Oct. 21, 2010

  • "He can't really control it."
    Pardon me, but that's a load of bullshit. He's choosing not to control it, and you're wasting a lot of energy beating yourself up thinking "it's a guy thing" and doubting yourself.
    Both of you have some choices to make.
    Fistandantalus

    Answer by Fistandantalus at 9:45 AM on Oct. 21, 2010

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