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why is it that most relationshiops dont last after having a child?

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mommymamamom

Asked by mommymamamom at 2:24 PM on Oct. 21, 2010 in Relationships

Level 5 (75 Credits)
Answers (20)
  • I don't think that it is true to say most don't last. But I think that most relationships that havent been given time to develop before having children dont last. Having a child is a blessing but also big responsibility, and some people take on this task WAY before they are ready for it.
    Ctink8189

    Answer by Ctink8189 at 2:27 PM on Oct. 21, 2010

  • What relationships don't last? I am confused by your question. I am still married to my husband we have a 5 and a 3 year old, we have been married for 13 years.
    Bubbie0809

    Answer by Bubbie0809 at 2:27 PM on Oct. 21, 2010

  • because the guy acts like a baby and the woman doesn't want to deal with that when she has a real baby to take care of.... guys get jealous of the baby
    randilinn

    Answer by randilinn at 2:27 PM on Oct. 21, 2010

  • I think couse it puts alot of stran on an already rocky relasonship. An men are scared of growing up.? idk
    valyesyaz

    Answer by valyesyaz at 2:29 PM on Oct. 21, 2010

  • Is that true? I would think only if the couple (or maybe just the mane) was immature to begin with would the relationship fail solely due to the responsibility of having a child.
    vicesix

    Answer by vicesix at 2:29 PM on Oct. 21, 2010

  • I've been married 25 years, I have gone through trouble in my relationship and watched many a friend/family member have issues after a child is born.. Here are some of my observations.
    *Some people choose to put their interpersonal relationship on the back burner once children come into the picture. This causes issues in a relationship.
    * Some choose to focus more on their children, their wants/needs etc, than their own or their spouses. This causes issues in a relationship.
    * Some are torn apart by the stress enters a relationship once children come into the picture. The stress really isn't what tears a couple a part, it's how the individuals handle that stress that does.
    * People grow & change (especially once they have children), a relationship needs to grow and change with the people in it.

    These are just a few of my personal experiences and observations, though. Not everyone's reality. :-)
    pixie_trix

    Answer by pixie_trix at 2:30 PM on Oct. 21, 2010

  • Well I know we had a routine life and although we new things would "change" I don't think many people understand what types of changed take place. We knew each other for 11 year before having our son, we married, been living together for 6 year etc.. what I am saying is we thought we were FAR better off than "most" people.. well our son had 14 hour a day colic, never slept, reflux, formula intolerances, couldn't take my Breast milk either without unlatching, I had PPD and was not sleeping... there were MANY Times I didn't think we could make it and had we not had a near perfect relationship and had that 11 years of communication down, I don't know we would have made it....we still battle over parenting issues but nothing compared to we did..
    maxsmom11807

    Answer by maxsmom11807 at 2:30 PM on Oct. 21, 2010

  • I also am not sure that "most" relationships don't last after having a child. A child is a lot of responsibility, and a relationship that already isn't strong is going to have an even harder time after a baby is born.

    Before getting pregnant couples need to have a strong level of commitment, be fairly mature, and hopefully somewhat established adults.....give yourself the best chance possible to make it, but even then it isn't easy....with or without kids.

    We have 3 kids, and have been married 22 years.....kids actually made our commitment to each other even stronger, we felt that they deserved to have their parents together, so we made more effort to work our "issues" out as they came up.
    ohwrite

    Answer by ohwrite at 2:32 PM on Oct. 21, 2010

  • * better off * meaning emotionally as a couple...lol!!
    maxsmom11807

    Answer by maxsmom11807 at 2:33 PM on Oct. 21, 2010

  • Because children are stressful! My baby was colicky and I went back to work FT after she was 10 wks old. My husband, too. Those early months were terrible. We fought all the time. Luckily we have a strong relationship so we never thought about walking away, but I can see why so many others do, esp. if you already have an unstable relationship. Nothing can prepare you for what life will be like with a child and many people cannot handle it.
    danielp

    Answer by danielp at 2:33 PM on Oct. 21, 2010

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