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2 Bumps

Why should it be right for your in-laws to treat you a certain way?

We had no choice but to move in with them. They complain about everything and act all high and mighty. If it were my dh that was treating me the way they are I wouldn't put up with it. Especially the little comments said just loud enough so they know you heard them over things they want us to do but won't do themselves (that wasn't agreed that just us would do when we moved in). We pay for ALL the food that comes in the house. We pay our share of bills. We are working very hard to move out asap, but seriously, Why do in laws, especially the older ones think that they have the right to treat you worse then they would even approve of their own son/grandson treating you???

Answer Question
 
Sarasmoonflower

Asked by Sarasmoonflower at 5:47 PM on Oct. 21, 2010 in Home & Garden

Level 13 (1,093 Credits)
Answers (8)
  • Wow hun sorry you have to go thru that some people just have no morals and all you can do is kill em with kindness....
    405mom

    Answer by 405mom at 5:50 PM on Oct. 21, 2010

  • Because they are set in their ways and used to having their home to themselves. You are now, essentially, long-term guests in their home. Ever had guests for more than a week?

    Still, there is no excuse for their rude behavior. Sit down and tell them how much it hurts you when they make those comments. Tell them that you would not be there bothering them if you did not have to be (a little guilt never hurt). Then play the sweet card and ask what you can do to make it easier for them (even if it means cleaning up after them, fixing meals, or whatever).
    neebug3766

    Answer by neebug3766 at 5:51 PM on Oct. 21, 2010

  • It's just a hard situation for everyone. Older people especially have a hard time when their routine is changed and having people move in isn't easy. I know I've had issues with my in laws because they make really rude comments about everyone that isn't part of their family. My MIL refers to everyone besides her children as an outsiders and this includes me. If I had to live with her I would find ways of being out of the house 99% of the time, libraries are nice.

    RyansMom001

    Answer by RyansMom001 at 5:52 PM on Oct. 21, 2010

  • I don't know. My MIL is like that - still. We've been married for 15 years and she still dost that kind of crap. Snide remarks, expecting us to pay her bills (no we do not live with her), thinking she should have free reign of our home, and of course never minding her own business. I'm sorry that you are having to deal with this, and I wish I could say it will get better. I guess it will when you move out. Good luck until then.
    scout_mom

    Answer by scout_mom at 5:53 PM on Oct. 21, 2010

  • because their young lives are over and done with and they want to get into everyone's business and try to tell you how to live your life and do things the way they think are supposed to be done! personally I live with my MIL and she DRIVES ME CRAZY! The totally different ways of thinking and living are getting to me, and my boyfriend really changed once we moved in there, he acts like a bratty kid around his family it is SO ANNOYING!
    MammaQuinny

    Answer by MammaQuinny at 5:55 PM on Oct. 21, 2010

  • Because you are under their roof. I know it hurts when they act that way, but the bottom line and with no disrespect, is that you need them. So they act tacky and snotty. GL and hope your situation gets better and you move soon and fast.
    mamacita69930

    Answer by mamacita69930 at 7:25 PM on Oct. 21, 2010

  • It is very hard to have to live with someone else, and it is very hard to have someone else live in your home.....you know they love you and yours or they wouldn't let you live there....it's just very hard all around, and the older a person gets, the harder it is to be flexible....it sounds like you need to sit down and talk....another person made some good suggestions about how that conversation should go from your end....let them know you appreciate them, ask them what you can do to help make things easier for everyone...they may feel taken advantage of somehow because they are only seeing things from their own perspective....best wishes...
    Anna92464

    Answer by Anna92464 at 8:00 PM on Oct. 21, 2010

  • LoL I like my MIL most of the time. She does some things that truly work my nerves when it comes to finances. (letting her other son live rent free then asking us for money UGGG)....but i think my mom is worse to deal with than hubbys. Shes the one that makes off the wall outta place comments so I kind of have to do my best to field her comments because i know how she is, I grew up with it!!! Hubby on the other hand is like next time Im done!! She wont be welcome here!!!

    THe only thing I can say is maybe try to have your hubby talk to them since its his family, other wise bite your tongue since you are in their house! It sucks i Know! But you wouldnt want to be put out!! They are technically doing you a favor!! Sorry you have to deal, best of luck!!
    sweetstkissez22

    Answer by sweetstkissez22 at 9:09 AM on Oct. 22, 2010

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