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A Facebook Question

A question on here just made me curious about spouses/ boyfriend/girlfriends having access to the others face book account......There is a guy who I contacted on face book, I knew him years ago and was so glad to see his profile. Well we became friends on there, we are in different cities and he is happily married and so am I. So one day I go to contact him on IM and his wife answers back wanting to know who I was, how we met which I told her with no problem and explained that there was nothing going on and he had told me about her. I was very nice and curtious to her but she got real ugly and nasty telling me I needed prayer and so forth... I personally don't think if you have jealousy issues you need to have access to your partners account. What do you think???? By the way the only thing I was messaging him about was just a hello. I have since deleted him from my friends list for her sake.


Asked by my2kids312 at 6:04 PM on Oct. 21, 2010 in Relationships

Level 11 (545 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (9)
  • i have access to my hubbys accounts, very rarely do i go on them. just like he has access to mine. i think that dropping him was the best thing for you to so you dont risk being an innocent by stander dragged into some drama.

    Answer by tiffanyv123 at 7:52 PM on Oct. 21, 2010

  • You have no idea what he has put her through or what is going on in their relationship. She is his wife. Whether or not you agree with it, you should respect their marriage. My ex pulled some shit on MySpace years ago connecting with an old friend, and even wanted me to talk to her an counsel her, the whole while encouraging an emotional relationship (too long of a story to explain) and making plans to visit with her when he went back home, etc. Just because he told you about her doesn't mean he's not a pig...

    Answer by figaro8895 at 6:19 PM on Oct. 21, 2010

  • I would say that if you don't want drama you did the right thing by deleting him. You don't need his wife being upset, and no friendship is worth causing stress to a marriage. That should come first.

    Answer by SylviaNCali at 6:22 PM on Oct. 21, 2010

  • Sorry to hear that. I had a guy friend that was similar. Never said anything to imply a relationship beyond friends, but his wife went INSANE whenever I contacted him. (But strangely, NOT other female friends of his.) Eventually, although we were GREAT friends, I gave up on the friendship. I got tired of being accused of something I wasn't doing, causing problems between them just by saying hello, etc.

    But you never know.She could just be a psycho hosebeast with major insecurity issues or she could genuinely have been concerned and freaked out. (Maybe he did or was cheating on her and she thought it was you?) Because, let's be honest, whether you were or not, the truth and the lie ("There's nothing going on, we're just friends...") is the same in both instances. And it sucks because you know you didn't do anything wrong, but defending yourself just makes you look worse to the other person.

    Answer by geminilove at 6:23 PM on Oct. 21, 2010

  • maybe he has given her reason to think something is up. i certainly wouldn't or haven't responded that way with his girl friends on facebook simply because i trust him.

    Answer by melody77 at 6:27 PM on Oct. 21, 2010

  • I can access my Hubby's and he can access mine... I don't think you were the one with the problem, she was. My Hubby talks to an old (female)friend from his Jr High days, and I don't mind. I don't have a reason to be jealous, and niether does he. I think it's better to have access, otherwise there's cause for concern...

    Answer by MrsLeftlane at 6:12 PM on Oct. 21, 2010

  • I would let my significant other into my account. I don't think you should hide things from each other. Actually getting into my ex's account is how I found out about him cheating on me, thus why I'm a single mommy now.

    Answer by EverydayMomma at 6:16 PM on Oct. 21, 2010

  • @figaro8895...I do understand that and have thought the same thing. He is a very handsome man, so perhaps he has cheated on her or they have had issues in the past. I think I did the best thing by deleting him. I do want to get myself involved with something that I know nothing about.

    Comment by my2kids312 (original poster) at 6:30 PM on Oct. 21, 2010

  • I don't say anything on FaceBook that I don't want to be public. !!

    Answer by JustMyOpinion22 at 7:07 PM on Oct. 21, 2010