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4 Bumps

If you were giving birth to a baby.. in Just under 19 weeks what would you do under the following situationas? adult content

BABY DUE 2/28/11 C-section date 2/21/11

Hubby has left us again.. this time I am not letting him come back. I have delt with him ping ponging back and forth for going on 9 years. My son who will be 8 on febuary 28th... Has suffered enough. My soon to be baby... I have no idea how I will provide for.. I just know I will. I am getting fixed at time of c-section.. So we never have to worry again about a little suprize.


6+ TIMES he left and I always tried to work things out because I truely don't beleive in divorce.. So as far as I am concerned I will be separated.. until he decides to get the divorce.
3+ Times I was in Domestic Violence shelters for mental and emotional cruelty.. Including being locked out of our home
4+ Times He had other women..
1 PROVEN Time he has Impregnated another woman and she gave birth to a cute little girl.. DURING OUR MARRAIGE
ALL THIS EQUALS
1 too many issues for me to TOLERATE!

 
MAKEMYDAY101

Asked by MAKEMYDAY101 at 7:56 PM on Oct. 21, 2010 in Relationships

Level 13 (1,302 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (18)
  • First of all let me say I commend you for trying everything in your power to not get divorced. So many people these days divorce so easily and it's ridiculous. There are other options for marriages in trouble besides divorce, and I respect you completely for being so strong.

    Although, a person should only be given so many chances. He obviously has proved to you that he's never going to change, he's going to keep on this destructive path, stepping all over you, disrespecting you, and being a bad example for his children. I'm sorry that he impregnated another woman, I couldn't imagine how painful that must be.

    If it were me, I would do exactly what you plan to do. Remain "separated" but STICK TO IT! Don't let him back in this time. Let HIM foot the bill for a divorce. After 9 years of marriage the least he could do is pay for it! You should get child support and alimony too from his stupid ass! Good luck to you dear!!!
    tnm786

    Answer by tnm786 at 8:04 PM on Oct. 21, 2010

  • i do have to question how serious you are though....i'm going to quote you if you don't mind just so you can read it.

    "Hubby has left us again.. this time I am not letting him come back."
    " I am getting fixed at time of c-section.. So we never have to worry again about a little suprize"

    if you are serious about leaving him i would think you wouldnt have to worry about a little surprise would you??

    shay1130

    Answer by shay1130 at 8:09 PM on Oct. 21, 2010

  • I agree that you shouldn't let him back in. That you and your children deserve soo much better. That means cutting your losses and losing this guy forever. I suggest packing up and moving out of the home you're in. Move in with family, friends, or your own place. Get you and the kids out of the situation and honestly make this a better life for you and them. He doesn't deserve you, he doesn't need you, he doesn't want you .. There is no reason for you to stay commited to someone who refuses to stay commited to you!
    JazzlikeMraz

    Answer by JazzlikeMraz at 8:42 PM on Oct. 21, 2010

  • print this out , print it many times
    tape it to the frig, tape it to the mirror in bathroom
    tape it in your car, put it in the junk drawer, in the medicine cabinet

    you need reminding that you have had enough

    ** I am guessing you have said enough is enough before
    let this time be the last time for real

    tape it to your forehead if you must!!
    fiatpax

    Answer by fiatpax at 8:52 PM on Oct. 21, 2010

  • This is toooo much..... I would have been gone a long time ago. You are a very forgiving person to allow him back so many times. I say, stay strong and don't budge this time. Life is short and you shouldn't have to live in a relationship that is so destructive to you and your children.
    sheloveearth

    Answer by sheloveearth at 8:35 PM on Oct. 21, 2010

  • Listen, I can understand you not believing in divorce. I can understand you trying to work things out. However, look at the list you just provided for us and genuinely ask yourself "Is this guy worth the vows that I stated to him?" He knows that you'll take him back, he knows that you'll forgive him, he knows that he can get away with all but murder and still remain married. Therefore, he continuously goes off and does whatever he wants regardless of the marriage he is in. Is that something you want to be attached to? Is that the name you want to carry? There has to be a moment when breaking the vows is the right thing to do, and honestly I think you are way beyond that point. He doesn't love you, he doesn't care about your family, he doesn't have a conscience, he isn't trustworthy, he isn't loyal, he isn't faithful .. Seriously, what will it take for you to agree that he's worth divorcing?
    JazzlikeMraz

    Answer by JazzlikeMraz at 8:41 PM on Oct. 21, 2010

  • He sounds like an abusive user. And that's all you're ever going to get out of him... abuse and use. He will take everything you can give and demand more and give nothing in return. Life is too short not to be happy. My grandmother stayed married to a man who abused and used her and her five children and she regretted it every single day after he died.

    Don't let that be you. Get out while the gettin' is good and dont' look back. Moving on from a mistake is not failure, continuing to live in it is!
    Ati_13

    Answer by Ati_13 at 9:19 PM on Oct. 21, 2010

  • Seems more like 16 times too many issues. Whatever you do I support you totally. You and your children deserve a better life. My prayers are with you.
    beckcorc

    Answer by beckcorc at 9:48 PM on Oct. 21, 2010

  • SO you know what you have to do. TIme to come up with a plan, find out who your friends are, and move on. Good luck to you and your family.
    DevilInPigtails

    Answer by DevilInPigtails at 8:01 PM on Oct. 21, 2010

  • i would wait until the baby was born so he can sign the birth certificate...then i would slap him upside the head with divorce papers
    shay1130

    Answer by shay1130 at 8:02 PM on Oct. 21, 2010