Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

How did yours kids react to miscarriage?

So I was just about 10 weeks pregnant when I found out I had miscarried (still has not passed nor have I started bleeding), but there is definitely no baby anymore :( I had already told my 6 year and 4 year old they were going to have a baby brother or sister and they were excited, especially the 4 year old. She was pretending she had a baby in her belly too.
I was terrified to tell them and wasn't sure how to answer all the questions, but we had the conversation tonight at dinner. Surprisingly, they took it rather well. Not emotional or upset. Mostly the questions were about pregnancy and what happens when you deliver a baby. They asked about them being in my belly and themselves as babies. I was open and honest with everything. I told them how they were delivered and everything and they seemed satisified with that.
Did anyone else have to experience this and did your kids react similarly?

Answer Question
 
CJM_SHM

Asked by CJM_SHM at 8:49 PM on Oct. 21, 2010 in Pregnancy

Level 15 (2,208 Credits)
Answers (8)
  • Yep it did not phase mine in the least. Just another day. They do not fully grasp the concept.
    Melbornj

    Answer by Melbornj at 8:50 PM on Oct. 21, 2010

  • I myself having suffered 3 miscarriages never mention it to anyone (except hubby) until I start showing. And I tell my older kids even later after then. I wouldn't even know how to tell my young kids about a miscarriage. Seems like you did agreat job. Sorry for your lost.
    keisha613

    Answer by keisha613 at 9:02 PM on Oct. 21, 2010

  • My oldest was 3. He didn't know any different. I'm sorry for your loss.
    Iluvmy5

    Answer by Iluvmy5 at 9:07 PM on Oct. 21, 2010

  • I was 10 weeks when I lost a baby as well and my 5 year old took it pretty well. My 2 year old didn't understand. I just told her the baby stopped growing and it was too small to be able to come and live with us so it was going to heaven. She was ok with that answer. She really didn't ask any questions until she saw me crying or when she wondered why I wasn't feeling good. I just told her that I was so sad that the baby wasn't coming and she would hug me and that was it. She hasn't forgotten about it but she seems to be ok with what happened. Hugs to you and I am sorry for your loss.
    khedy

    Answer by khedy at 9:08 PM on Oct. 21, 2010

  • My sons were 7 and 3 when I had my miscarriage. Just for context I have to mention that my sister had had a baby about a month earlier. I was 12w when I had the m/c so we had told everyone about the pregnancy, including the kids. I ended up spending a night in the hospital, needing a D&C because of hemmorhaging and then a few days recuperating at home - weak because of the blood loss. We told the kids that the baby had died. My younger son didn't really get it - but I don't think the fact that there was a baby was "real" to him anyway. My older son didn't understand why we were so upset that the baby had died because he thought we meant my niece and that that we would still have our baby in a while. He was a little sad when we explained it was our baby, but as with our other son, the baby wasn't "real" to him yet, so it didn't have as big an impact.
    canadianmom1974

    Answer by canadianmom1974 at 10:53 PM on Oct. 21, 2010

  • Thanks everyone who answered. I knew I wasn't alone at this time, but it feels good to actually to hear from others who have been in my shoes. It's actually very comforting to hear from you all.
    CJM_SHM

    Comment by CJM_SHM (original poster) at 11:33 PM on Oct. 21, 2010

  • Well with one of my miscarriages they told my nieces and nephews that my baby went to heaven to be an angel and they would help watch over us.
    ladyambition

    Answer by ladyambition at 11:44 PM on Oct. 21, 2010

  • im sorry for your loss
    lovebunny82709

    Answer by lovebunny82709 at 3:18 AM on Oct. 22, 2010

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.
close Join now to connect to
other members!
Connect with Facebook or Sign Up Using Email

Already Joined? LOG IN