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who else has days they just want to sob because they are a parent to a teen?

I feel like it is constant.... Like if I make a mistake now it could effect their WHOLE future... what if they dont get into college... what if they drink and drive... what if they start having sex... what if they f up and get knocked up.... what if they try a drug... what if they get addicted... what if what if what if.

THERE IS TOOOOO MUCH GUILT RAISING A TEEN..... im having a bad mommy day.

anyone else?????

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 5:15 PM on Oct. 22, 2010 in Teens (13-17)

Answers (10)
  • thankfully i am not there yet. i feel your pain though, i was a horrible teenager. just be confident in what you are doing and that you are teaching them the right thing.
    woodit2u

    Answer by woodit2u at 5:20 PM on Oct. 22, 2010

  • I too have felt like that. But you can't be a bad mommy if you're feeling like this, cause bad mommies don't care!! I have spent so much time with my 17yo dd talking about what is expected of her when it comes to drinking, driving, dating, school, college, working, and anything else you can think of. And the past 3 years have not always been easy. But I am left with the feeling that I did all that I can do and now it is time to see if she heard me. And it is killing me to let her go and the thought of her going away to college next year is gut-wrenching. But I know that she will and I know that she will be fine, because if she isn't, well, I am always here. It is so easy to type these words, but I tell you, knowing them and believing them are very different than living them.
    Hang in there, I know I'm trying too. You can message me if you like.
    wallmom1

    Answer by wallmom1 at 5:22 PM on Oct. 22, 2010

  • I am there with you! I have a 14 year old son freshman in high school that knows what he wants out of his future and knows that he has to work his a** off to get where he wants to be and then there's my daughter, she's 13 boy crazy, hates school, thinks our rules are stupid and so forth..I worry so much about them both. I talk and talk to my kids about sex, teenage pregnancy, diseases, drugs, I've been through all of the above (except for the disease part, lol) and I hope that all of the talks I've had with them the last 14 years something sticks to them. They are truly great kids but as moms I think it's hard for us to accept that we cannot watch them 24 hours a day and once they leave our home they have so much other influence both good and bad when they go to school and that we cannot control, it is also hard to allow them to make mistakes and learn from them. Hugs to you mama!
    LuvmyFam6

    Answer by LuvmyFam6 at 5:36 PM on Oct. 22, 2010

  • Our older daughter is two weeks away from 16. Until this point I've felt really confident in the choices we have made with her. I feel pressure to give her more freedom, but it scares the poo plumb out of me. I know I can't keep her sheltered forever but it's still hard to take. Good luck to you, to all of us!
    scout_mom

    Answer by scout_mom at 6:47 PM on Oct. 22, 2010

  • I do but I have learned to not worry about what I cannot control. All we can do is give the a basis to live a good life, give them morals, values, ethics and hope for the best. Teens will experiment, they will mess up and make mistakes and that is OK as long as they learn from those mistakes. Take it one day at a time. At a certain point (about 15ish) it is no longer our problem, it is about giving the teens enough freedom to make choices, make mistakes and grow.
    tyfry7496

    Answer by tyfry7496 at 7:16 PM on Oct. 22, 2010

  • you can only do so much and then they become teens and they are more influenced by thier peers then anything and everything you taught them pretty much goes out the window until their 2 nd yr of college.

    All stages of parenting up until the age of 13 are a breeze....when the teen yrs hit we wonder what in the world were we thinking?! we wanted little babies and to watch them grow into little kids....then the teen yrs happen and there is no going back
    wheresthewayout

    Answer by wheresthewayout at 2:37 AM on Oct. 23, 2010

  • This is the worst phase for our children, it is stress city 24/7, learning to give and take when necessary is a must, they are preparing to deal with the real world and life, we constantly need to supply them with survival lines, and hope and pray some of it sinks in.
    older

    Answer by older at 10:06 AM on Oct. 23, 2010

  • Everyday it is something new, it is the age. One minute he doesn't text you when you are expecting him to, the next minute he is tossing his sister across the room.

    I understand your angst.
    cerealmom2

    Answer by cerealmom2 at 6:48 PM on Oct. 24, 2010

  • you have to reasure yourself you've instilled good values in her.....then you got let the rest go.....because if you are contantly doing the what if game then your going to worry yourself in to an early grave with the stress.......
    cara124

    Answer by cara124 at 10:08 AM on Oct. 26, 2010

  • I have 3 teens right now and I feel like that everyday. Sometimes I can't sleep at night from the worrying. And when they're out driving at night, I'm almost sick. Thinking about their future makes me absolutely nuts. Maybe should form a support group!!
    ceallaigh

    Answer by ceallaigh at 5:27 PM on Oct. 26, 2010

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