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Is rewarding a child with THINGS for good behavior a good idea?

I'm wondering if a child does what their told, etc... should we reward them with candy, toys, etc... (plz keep it clean for the little ones. Thank you_)

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Prayerpartner

Asked by Prayerpartner at 2:16 AM on Oct. 23, 2010 in General Parenting

Level 20 (10,072 Credits)
Answers (8)
  • The only time we've rewarded with material things is during potty training. Otherwise, loads of praise will take you far. If they get used to having something for doing something right, they will always expect that.
    musicpisces

    Answer by musicpisces at 2:20 AM on Oct. 23, 2010

  • I mix it up, sometimes a reward is a trip to the park, sometimes she gets a barbie doll. She is rewarded for good behavior. Not always things, but sometimes, yes!
    blessedwithree

    Answer by blessedwithree at 2:46 AM on Oct. 23, 2010

  • Reward them with praise, physical attention-pat on the head or hugs, special play time-one or one or board games, or baking together.
    QandA

    Answer by QandA at 9:25 AM on Oct. 23, 2010

  • Absolutely not.
    aliceinalgonac

    Answer by aliceinalgonac at 9:40 AM on Oct. 23, 2010

  • Not in my house. They either do it or they get into trouble. SOMETIMES, if I am in a good mood they may get something at the store but, not all the time more like once a month.
    matthewscandi

    Answer by matthewscandi at 9:49 AM on Oct. 23, 2010

  • Sure. It gives them something to shoot for. I mean, if you do a good job at work, don't you expect to be rewarded with recognition or a raise? Why would a child be any different?
    SabrinaMBowen

    Answer by SabrinaMBowen at 11:49 AM on Oct. 23, 2010

  • I think it ends up backfiring more often than not.  We've tried reward systems like with just stickers or pennies or something small and instead of making them behave better or get them to do their chores they did less.  They would demand to know how much whatever chore/behavior was worth and if they didn't like the amount they wouldn't do it.


    When we give rewards for behavior now it's rare and for going above and beyond what we normally expect.  The first time was this summer.  I was pregnant and unable to do much.  My 7yo dd stepped up and was cleaning the kitchen for me and just being all around helpful so I took her to the store and got her a toy and ice cream (she was the only one that offered to help me out of my 4 kids).  Then earlier this month she was at it again so we bought her a zhu zhu pet for being so helpful.

    justanotherjen

    Answer by justanotherjen at 12:05 PM on Oct. 23, 2010

  • I have a chore chart for the kids - if they do all their chores without me reminding them, I'll get them something special (video game, etc.) Sometimes they get a surprise after a week, sometimes it's two months, but they know that they aren't going to get extras unless they are doing their chores and following the rules. It works really well for us, they know that they have to be responsible, and they don't think that every time they help out they are going to get something.
    Scuba

    Answer by Scuba at 2:41 PM on Oct. 23, 2010

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