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Major crush on a guy I just found out is gay; I feel so down, I just want to hide in a whole somewhere.

Yeah, that's just like me ... Actually I'd like to burry my head under the pillows and have a big cry.
Crushes happen, they come and go, but what makes it so bad is, that I sort of came out of my shell again. Finally. And he's the first man I'm having feelings for since my husband died 2 yeas ago. Today I found out he's gay! (but without partner at the moment) That totally threw me off balance. I'm so insecure now about my own feelings. Do I like him for who is he or am I just being needy after the grief. Why did I pick him? Should I go for it? Maybe he's bisexual. You never know. Could I still have him as a friend? And if so how do I get past the "wanting-him"?
He's so kind and sweet and OMG handsome. Even my dd (4) likes him.
What do I do? The worst is this big chaos in my head momentarily. Can't think straight. Anybody give me a hug!


Asked by Anonymous at 3:04 AM on Oct. 23, 2010 in Relationships

This question is closed.
Answers (6)
  • 1. Sorry about the loss of your husband. (hugs)
    2. Gay guys are always hot and fun! I love gay guys!
    3. It's not your fault he's gay. How were you supposed to know? No need to feel insecure because you were attracted to a gay man.
    4. Yes! Turn him into a friend. You will have a shopping buddy, somebody to confide in etc. and you won't have to deal with the catty behavior that some women love.
    5. Good luck! I hope everything works out for you! Enjoy your new gay friend:)

    Answer by theutilitarian at 3:14 AM on Oct. 23, 2010

  • hey girl. its ok to have feelings for a gay guy.. all my besties are gay. i suppose maybe you like him because he is caring and sensitive, much like women are .. doesnt mean your silly or bad for liking him.. if you can try and get past the feelings you guys might actually be good friends.. but until then i think you need a break from him. dont feel down about it.. it happens alot trust me!

    there are alot of men out there who arent gay and are sensitive, romantic and caring. dont think he is bisexual. if hes plainly gay he wont be interested in women. he could be bisexual but not sure without more info

    hang in there., this is a tough time and takes time to heal. get out there an meet new people. doenst have to be for love. just friendship

    Answer by Weldo1983 at 3:12 AM on Oct. 23, 2010

  • Exactly what they said!   

      hugsfrom me.


    Answer by earlgrey at 5:18 AM on Oct. 23, 2010

  • wow so many questions .. i agree with first reply

    Answer by san78 at 7:48 AM on Oct. 23, 2010

  • Bless your, you shouldn't go for it if he's gay, he's offering you friendship, and that will have to be enough.....crushes come and go if you don't nurture them......and it is good you are coming out of your shell........

    Answer by Anna92464 at 10:42 AM on Oct. 23, 2010

  • hugsSending a Big Hug your way:)


    Answer by daisyb at 11:53 AM on Oct. 23, 2010