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Can you relate?

I have 5 kids. A set of 3 older children. I also have two boys that are 13 months apart with my BF I was 39 and 40 when I had them. They are now 2 and 3. I feel like a walking nervous breakdown. I don't want to go anywhere or do anything becasue it is s much work. My 3 yr old is a huge brat at times. Please tell me this gets better! I worry that he won't behave in school. My first three were so good. I am losing my mind! I enjoyed my first three so much,but with these two I am in misery. I feel like a bad mom because I have no patients with them...I love them and do the best I can, but I live for bed time. I feel so guilty because I just want to be left alone. I know I should have thought of this before I had husband tells me this from time to time not to be mean but to keep me sucking it up and moving on. I am so tired and I feel bad...I don't know what to do.


Asked by Anonymous at 3:15 PM on Oct. 29, 2008 in General Parenting

This question is closed.
Answers (6)
  • You did a GOOD thing by having them close together. In less than a year, you will have two preschoolers and life will get easier on you. Now, schedule time EVERY week for a date, a few hours to get your house, meals, clothes in order. Find a babysitter or get your older kids to pitch in. Ask hubby to take the little ones once a week for a couple of hours and make yourself have "me" time. Does the two yo take naps? I would work on discipline with the 3 yo, including "quiet time" while the toddler takes a nap. Make yourself nap or rest. Watch Supernanny with hubby every week to get tips with your 3 yo. If you need to, take a day to better organize. PM me if you need ideas. Hang in there...

    Answer by manna1qd at 5:17 PM on Oct. 29, 2008

  • I'm the same way! My kids are 2, 4, and 5 and are SO hard to take out in public. I feel like I'm being pulled in 10 different directions when I'm out and can't get a moment to enjoy myself. I'm always coutning down to naptime/bedtime, lol. My husband wonders why I stay up so's because it's the only time I get to myself when I can read or do my other hobbies.

    Answer by ReneeK3 at 3:18 PM on Oct. 29, 2008

  • Everyone can have those same feelings at times. Admitting that you hve them is the first step. Second step is to do something about it. TAKE a BREAK! You deserve it. Go away for a weekend w/out the kids, even if it's just to your a friends house for a change of pace. I let all my kids (save for my youngest 3), go to Maine fro a good week w/ my hubby while I stayed home to enjoy the peace and quiet. I admit I did NOT miss the chaos. I have 5 kids in the home, and 3 more that have moved out. So I get where you are. I took a break by last year and went to the Landmark Forum which is a weekend seminar. It was totally exhausting, but I came away renewed and with a fresh outlook on life. Try it!

    Answer by onlycathyo at 3:30 PM on Oct. 29, 2008

  • I have a 6, 4 and soon to be 3 year old. I feel your pain. I'm told it gets better, but these years are a blur...I just take lots of pictures of all the 'situations' and 'messes' they create so I can show them how much I put up with! Don't worry, you are a good mom...just try to remember how much you love them and don't feel guilty for not taking them least you know what you willing to handle!

    Answer by MamaKush at 3:32 PM on Oct. 29, 2008

  • well, i have a 8 year old that is like a bully in our family. he picks on everyone and fights and cant let things go, when he's in school, he is a whole different person! his teachers love him sooo much! even still, when he gets home, he's still the bully. Hope i could be a help in that department.

    to tell you the truth, i've been feeling very lonely lately, even though i have my 4 kids around me, i need at least some adult contact, thank god for cafemom and my groups, that there's is some. Sometimes that isnt enough so last night i felt like crying cause my hubby isnt around enough to give that adult contact, and when he is around on weekends, its like he trys to find things to do with everyone else! im not even sure what to do about all this but i do know im at the point where i dont feel like going any where and i dont even care anymore about what the hubby does.

    Answer by americansugar80 at 3:58 PM on Oct. 29, 2008

  • Mine are 6, 9 & 10 and believe me I know exactly where you're coming from and it is very frustrating to the point I don't want to take them out in public for fear they'll cut up but I can't sit in the house w/ them either because they'll drive me totally nuts (more so than they've already drove me lol). I've even told mine (all the way down to my 6 yr. old) to shut the hell up and go somewhere and I hate that I feel that way. I'm thinking about joining an exercise class to vent some of the stress as well as drop a few (ALOT OF) unwanted pounds lol.

    Answer by LovingParent08 at 4:56 PM on Oct. 29, 2008