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"Is it Me?"

He was previously married and has been divorced from his first wife for about 22 years now.When I first met my husband he initially indicated that he was divorced from his wife. The ex-wife has maintained contact with his family for the last 20 years. I thought it would be good if we all got together and just sort of nipped any negative feelings in the bud. However, my husband thought it would be a bad idea. He said that the reason why our marriage lasted so long is probably because he has not had any contact with his ex-wife. He also said that he wasn't sure if old feelings would be reignited. Needless to say, I was speechless. The ex-wife has since divorced her husband and has made contact with mine. My husband assures me that I'm reading too much into the situation. Am I? Should I be concerned?

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 8:06 PM on Jul. 3, 2008 in Relationships

Answers (4)
  • There is no reason for them to talk. If he didnt want you to meet her before why is he talking to her now.

    Answer by MrsBrc at 8:19 PM on Jul. 3, 2008

  • I believe that many women find old flames after a breakup to see if the spark is still there. It would be nice if she respected the fact that your h is married to you now. You can do one or more of several things. 1) do nothing 2) contact her and ask her what her intentions are 3)reiterate to him how it makes you feel that they are talking and ask him to not do it without you there. You have become one via marriage. You have a right to be there when they communicate. she had her chance with him and needs to be encouraged to find her own place in life with a single man, not your h. H needs to support you and your feelings. ...and don't fall for that "but he understands me crap" either. She needs to let go.

    Answer by admckenzie at 8:42 PM on Jul. 3, 2008

  • i agree with the lady above me. it would be different if they had maintained that contact because of kids or whatever but since they haven't, she can buzz her butt around some other woman's flower.

    Answer by princezzmommie at 10:14 PM on Jul. 3, 2008

  • He is cheating on you! He will want his love back, he had alot with her and misses her.

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:40 PM on Jul. 3, 2008

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