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I have a 5 yo and is now refusing to use toilet.

I started potty training her little brother (3) and now she wants to wear pull ups/diapers. At school I think she will be okay because she did wear underwear. At home though she tries to get confrontial with me and refuses to wear underwear.

I refuse to give her candy as a reward. She has bad teeth and already has to get a tooth pulled and had fillings. What other ideas could I use to encourage her to go back to using the potty and letting me work with her brother to potty train.

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Asked by Anonymous at 8:30 AM on Oct. 25, 2010 in General Parenting

Answers (2)
  • This is all about attention seeking. She does NOT need a reward to use the potty. She knows how, she's just refusing to do so.

    What priveledges does she have that her 3 year old brother does not? Can she stay up later? Can she play with things he can't? Find something to take away from her until she acts like the 5 year old she is, not the three year old she's not.

    When she is back on track, make sure you give her plenty of attention for what SHE is doing well. Play with her, have a tea party with her, do something SHE enjoys.

    Answer by layh41407 at 8:38 AM on Oct. 25, 2010

  • When I was training my youngest, my oldest caught jealous. I found that if I rewarded her for her reading this helped. We also discussed how she got a $1 a week for chores and her sister doesn't. Plus the rewards she gets at school and her sister doesn't. THis all helped.

    But I agree with layh41407, don't reward her for potty training. But I would start with a little one on one time. And when ever she does do something you like thank her or give her a hug. Re-enforce what you want. And if you can let her go butt naked don't fight her to wear undies but I wouldn't let her leave the house or have friends over if she doesn't have them on and no pull ups.

    She is looking for attention give it to her when she is acting like a 5 yo. Ignore as much as you can of the 3yo behavior.

    Answer by DevilInPigtails at 10:01 AM on Oct. 25, 2010

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