Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

3 Bumps

Would this bother you???

My fiance was supossed to do something romantic for me last night while I was gone for about 2 hours and when I got back he had drawn me a picture of our family with bannanna peppers as our heads the kind you eat he drew faces on them and said that was my romantic thing...It really hurt my feeling.

Answer Question

Asked by jessesmama22 at 5:11 PM on Oct. 26, 2010 in Relationships

Level 18 (5,311 Credits)
Answers (10)
  • Id be pissed it sounds like something my boyfriend would do. I dont think he has a romantic brain cell in his body!!

    Answer by ahsweetness at 5:15 PM on Oct. 26, 2010

  • Was it a serious effort?

    Answer by randibosin at 5:15 PM on Oct. 26, 2010

  • Lol, I think that is cute. Maybe not your idea of romantic but he was being goofy and put in the effort. If you weren't happy with it then I would suggest something romantic to him that you'd like.

    Answer by worriedmommy600 at 5:15 PM on Oct. 26, 2010

  • Maybe he does not know what romantic is.

    Answer by louise2 at 5:16 PM on Oct. 26, 2010

  • It wouldn't hurt my feelings, but I would be greatly dissapointed that that's what he considered "romantic". Ontop of that, that that's about as little effort as one can put into doing something romantic. Let him know how you feel though. He can't learn if he doesn't know what he did wrong.

    Answer by JazzlikeMraz at 5:16 PM on Oct. 26, 2010

  • Make your plans and asked him to join you. Try to view it as romantic. Some people just do not know how to be romantic. If he joins you count it positive. i could not get my husband to join me for anything. It's just not worth the fight. Good luck.

    Answer by KISS1224 at 5:18 PM on Oct. 26, 2010

  • He may not know how to be romantic or maybe his idea of romance isn't the same as yours. Maybe do something romantic for him and let him know that that is the kind of thing that you would like.

    Answer by sue118 at 5:20 PM on Oct. 26, 2010

  • Let him show romance (as he sees it) when he wants to. My SO says that if he shows up to be with me that should be romantic enough for me! After 4.5 yrs, I know it's as good as I'm going to get out of him!

    Answer by admckenzie at 5:20 PM on Oct. 26, 2010

  • Be honest with him. Let him know what you were expecting as the definition of "romantic". Acknowledge the time and effort he put into his drawing, and take it at face value. We all have different ways of receiving and expressing love. Communication is the key to learning how to make your SO know how to make you happy. Ask him why he drew the picture, and what it means for him. Then share a good laugh together about the Banana Pepper Family, and snuggle up for a chick flick (your turn to choose something, right?)

    Answer by Reenieredhead at 5:25 PM on Oct. 26, 2010

  • That may have been a romantic gesture in his eyes.

    Your idea of "romantic gesture" and his maybe very different. I know mine and my husband's are.

    One reason I used to get hurt and disappointed when my husband and I were first married, was because I was expecting him to do things that I found romantic. I never considered that he did things for me that **he**considered to be romantic. We had to learn each other's views of "romantic" so that we recognized a romantic gesture when it was done. Instead of 1 of us being hurt because we didn't receive (or what was done) wasn't what we viewed as romantic. And the other didn't get hurt because their gesture was not recognized or appreciated.

    Now 25 years in, I honestly feel my husband is incrediblly romantic, and does romantic things for me on a daily basis. And that's due to me recognizing/understanding his gestures for their intention, not just the action alone.

    Answer by pixie_trix at 5:29 PM on Oct. 26, 2010

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.

Next question in Relationships

Next question overall (Holidays)
What's a Trick Or Treat no no??