Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

6 Bumps

Do you see your husband as your property?

Are you his?

I was just reading through answers on another question and I was completely appalled at the amount of women seemed to think they owned their husband or something...

Answer Question
 
SabrinaMBowen

Asked by SabrinaMBowen at 8:56 PM on Oct. 26, 2010 in Relationships

Level 40 (122,988 Credits)
Answers (19)
  • He is mine in the sense that I have his love, he has mine, and we both command respect, fidelity, and total trust. That doesn't mean he isn't his own person. If he stops off somewhere I don't demand to know where he's been every minute of every single day. We are both are own person, yet we are still one in the sense that we have chosen to share our lives with each other. I'm his, he's mine. Doesn't really matter what you call us as long as we have love, respect, and trust.

    I'm not his "Property". If he tells me I can't wear something I tell him to go fly a kite. Unless its truly scandalous (as in wardrobe malfunction) then I understand saying something.
    SalemWitchChild

    Answer by SalemWitchChild at 9:01 PM on Oct. 26, 2010

  • See, Salem, that's how I feel. Do we belong TOGETHER? Yes. Do we belong to each other? No. We are still both very much our own people. I mean, sure, if he's doing something I don't like or visa versa we can talk about things and come to an agreement or decide together if and how things should change. But I would love for him to try and tell me I am not ALLOWED to do something... And if I tried to do something like that to him he would simply laugh! We don't own one another, instead we choose to do things as a couple... BIG difference.
    SabrinaMBowen

    Comment by SabrinaMBowen (original poster) at 9:05 PM on Oct. 26, 2010

  • UGH i see that 2 .. drives me nuts, they think once they marry them or get with them its time to put on the handcuffs, he cant go out w/o me has to be home iwth me yada yada.. no offense we were both humans with other friends before we came a US and i think if he had to be with me 24/7 and vice versa id go nuts!! i think spending all ur spare time together is more damaging then anything, i love having me time, or girl time and he likes having his time.. who doesnt..i mean i love him and id fight for him its nice to know i can still be me and us at same time
    mnmommy83

    Answer by mnmommy83 at 9:14 PM on Oct. 26, 2010

  • Not as property...but i beling to my husband and he belongs to me so all of the other women better back off lol. But he would never tell me that i can not do something unless it is something crazy like wanting to become a stripper lol. Even though he did let me try that one night lol..I am the kind of girl that likes to say i did that...So he let me try one night and then he said no more. And I was ok with that...I didnt want to make a real job out of it...just for fun one night only. He has told me that he didnt like a pair of shorts that i have because he thinks they are to short so i dont wear them but he only said that because he dosnt want other guys looking lol.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:19 PM on Oct. 26, 2010

  • NO! NO! NO! I do not own ANYONE and I am no one possession, either. This is one reason why I get bashed sometimes because of my feelings about sex. I believe in open relationships (though I'm not in one at the moment, we have talked a lot about it), if both parties agree because sometimes one person just doesn't suit all of your needs all the time. I also kind of believe in polygamy, even though it's illegal. I just don't see a problem in loving more than one person. I think that you can definitely be in love with more than one person at a time from personal experience. It isn't always love for one and lust for another. Sorry, I digress.

    My husband does not control me, and I do not control him. We do not own one another. We are separate people, and that's the way I think it should be.
    Mrs.BAT

    Answer by Mrs.BAT at 9:23 PM on Oct. 26, 2010

  • I get bashed a good bit to because I believe in an open relationship as well - but like you I'm not in one. So I hear where you're coming from.
    SabrinaMBowen

    Comment by SabrinaMBowen (original poster) at 9:25 PM on Oct. 26, 2010

  • seriously can anyone own someone? you may think you do but you can't put a price on them and sell them as property. if only i could but i probably wouldn't get much for mine. although i do believe you should be one with someone but you would have to agree to be so. if you become one you kinda own each other or belong to each other.
    melody77

    Answer by melody77 at 9:36 PM on Oct. 26, 2010

  • No. I do not own him. I can force him to do things b/c well...he is stubborn and what kind of marriage is that!
    Mom2Just1

    Answer by Mom2Just1 at 9:50 PM on Oct. 26, 2010

  • We belong to each other but we're not each other's property. If this is in response to the question I think it is, it's not jealousy or wanting to own one's husband if she doesn't want him out at the bar drinking with another woman. If a spouse has a problem with something the other one is doing, that should matter. If it doesn't, that is what should be appalling.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:01 PM on Oct. 26, 2010

  • Well, he's MY husband as in no one else's, just like my kids are mine. But no I don't own him - he is his own person, as am I. We each get to make our own choices and decisions, but we generally agree on most things because we value our marriage and each other.
    canadianmom1974

    Answer by canadianmom1974 at 10:21 PM on Oct. 26, 2010

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.

Next question in Relationships
i dont know what to do

Next question overall (Health)
acupuncture

close Cafemom Join now to connect to other members! Connect with Facebook or Sign Up Using Email

Already Joined? LOG IN