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my kid is so mean to his younger brother

Not always, but it really bothers me some of the things my older son (5) does to my younger (21 months). I am probably sensitive to it because I was the younger sister and my older one used to beat the crap out of me every day and noone ever did a thing about it. I know it is normal to have sibling rivalry, but sometimes I think it is just too much. My son has his own spaces in the house where he has his own things that his brother cant get to, and I make sure that we are as fair as possible when it comes to sharing, etc. It is when he gets really mad or yells at his brother for dumb things.. like to stop singing a song because he hates it, or pushes him to get out of his way, etc.. Is this just normal? It seems silly, but it really effects me. I want to see my boys get along....

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Asked by Anonymous at 11:21 AM on Oct. 27, 2010 in General Parenting

Answers (8)
  • This is totally normal, it will ease up after they get older, there seems to be a bit of jealousy which is also totally normal, be patient mom, just keep drilling that there is nothing out there better than family.

    Answer by older at 11:24 AM on Oct. 27, 2010

  • I would not tolerate the older one pushing the younger one. He should not be putting his hands on him. I would punish the older one to his room or to sit in a corner every time he does it.

    Answer by dancer at 11:27 AM on Oct. 27, 2010

  • Sounds normal but just remind your son of why he should not act that way, and hands are for playing not hitting...Hitting is unexceptable, will it stop probably not, and if it gets too much.

    Try to redirect your older son, make his stuff just as important and remind him daily that somethings he has his brother is too young to touch.

    Hopefully it will get easier to cope with. :) Good luck !!!!

    Answer by KFree907 at 11:28 AM on Oct. 27, 2010

  • I would not get mad at the older son, but i would definitely discipline him for his actions in a calm manner. Take away some of his rights, favorite toys, or TV shows. Or, do not allow him desert. There are many things you can use as leverage with him.

    Answer by samurai_chica at 11:31 AM on Oct. 27, 2010

  • I'm kind of in the same situation, my 4 year old screams/shoves/yells at/pushes down her 17 month old sister. Little sister has been fighting back though and older sister doesn't like it, she comes crying to me. I just tell her to do to her little sister what she wants done to her. I too hope it gets better.

    Answer by Nanixh at 11:40 AM on Oct. 27, 2010

  • Whatever you do you got to nip this one in the butt. No matter what age the children got to learn it’s not acceptable. That’s how bullies start learning to bully others in the school system and then you have a problem on your hands.

    Answer by musicmom08 at 11:40 AM on Oct. 27, 2010

  • I would discipline him. it is very normal though.

    Answer by arenad at 12:20 PM on Oct. 27, 2010

  • It is normal, but it is not acceptable. So when he pushes baby brother, take him back over and explain how to ask baby brother to move. When he yells because baby brother is singing a song he doesn't like, encourage him to teach baby brother a song that he does like. And remember, this will not go away, some days I feel more like referee than mom.

    Answer by Petie at 12:20 PM on Oct. 27, 2010

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