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What is a Mid-live crisis and how do you survive it?

My husband is acting really weird. I found out he was talking to another girl, either on the cellphone or by text. He promised me, he never had an affair, he just talked to her. For some reason I want to believe him. (Hope I am not making a mistake).Anyway, I think he is going through his mid-life crisis, any suggestion in how to help him and keep my marriage alive?

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Asked by Anonymous at 2:05 PM on Oct. 27, 2010 in Relationships

Answers (5)
  • Im sorry to tell you that is NOT a mid life crisis... that is simply bad behavior.  Dont you dare give him an out thinking that he is "going through something" it was a choice he made, and a immoral one at that.

    Im not sure what to tell you other than to keep working on the marriage and keep talking to him.  It IS very possible to come back from this.  Be his girl friend and start talking to him.  Find out what he felt was lacking... work through it.


    Answer by Anonymous at 2:09 PM on Oct. 27, 2010

  • My personal view on "Mid Life Crisis".

    A mid life crisis is a point and time in which a person questions their life. Am I happy? Am I living how I truly want to live? Is this the job/career I am going to be happy with for the next 20 years? ect.. This happens to some people many times in a life times (like myself) , some only once or twice.

    A mid life crisis itself is neither good or bad.. how someone reacts to it is where the good or bad comes in. Some react to a mid life crisis by: changing careers, pursueing an education, taking up new hobbies, exercising more, travelling, experiencing new things..etc.... Some react in a more negative manner: by acting out towards those closest to them, feeling/thinking that the grass is greener elsewhere, leaving families, having an affair, developing bad habits,...etc.

    Whether or not your husband is having a period of "questioning" is only something he would know.


    Answer by pixie_trix at 2:12 PM on Oct. 27, 2010

  • If you want to know if he is having this period of questioning. Then you must ask him if that's what's going on. Not "Hey are you having a mid life crisis.." But something along the lines of "are you happy with your life as it is, are you questioning things in your life right now"... KWIM.

    If your concern is this person he is talking to. Then you need to ask him what it is that he is getting from this relationship. Why does he want to have this type of contact with her. He is getting something from her, whether that be attention, ego strokes, companionship, understanding..ect.. Only he knows what he is getting from her. The reason people pursue relationships, even friendships, is because we get something out of them,. Whether that person understands us, makes us laugh, makes us think, makes us feel good. etc.. We have a relationship because of somethign we receive from it. Same with him & her.

    Answer by pixie_trix at 2:16 PM on Oct. 27, 2010

  • you have to talk to him and find out what he really wants out of life and what you do and hope its the same thing but you botgh have to be totaly honest.

    Answer by peace013 at 2:39 PM on Oct. 27, 2010

  • Dealing with midlife crisis right now. Right now, I'm too old to be young, and too young to be old.

    How I deal with it -
    1. I don't run out to get pregnant to stay young - no bashing here. I was tempted as many late thirties/late forties do, but didn't.
    2. I decided to reinvent myself. Work smarter, not harder.
    3. I started questioning everything to weedout the dead weight that held me back.
    4. Idolize older and very successful women
    5. Learned not to hold too much stake in men, but always hold stake in my daughter -she will always be mine
    6. Not to always follow the hype, but be true to myself

    There are more. Just can't think right now.

    As for your husband. he sound that he really needs direction to move forward. He needs to have meaning within himself. Acting younger is too humiliating to one's self in the long run.

    Answer by BlueSaphire at 7:12 PM on Oct. 27, 2010

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