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3 Bumps

i am thinking about cutting all ties with my son's dad totally. like no communication at all. would i be wrong? my son's dad aka sperm donor. doesnt do about nothing for my son.

i told him since last week my son needed some more baby supplies and stuff. he said ok. and then asked again what is the money for. i told him if he didnt believe he could go to the store and buy himself or come to the store with me. no money yet. everyday an excuse. he always brags he has all this money and he can take care his kid. but i dont see anything he thinks $30-40 a month is taking care a child. he once told that if i put him on child support he wouldnt do anything. like he is calling my bluff. he is not a role model for my son at all his lifestyle is fast money and fast living. i just wanna say adios and leave my son and me alone. dont come calling or texting when he pops up in your mind. would i be a bad mother or selfish woman if i stopped all communication with him? i just dont want him to disappoint my son.

 
survivormama10

Asked by survivormama10 at 10:38 PM on Oct. 27, 2010 in General Parenting

Level 10 (492 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (11)
  • you can tell him good luck on not paying cuz after you get so far behind on childsupport its off to jail you go for A YEAR...and no the childsupport doesnt stop when your in there it just keeps building..and i say its fine to tell him to hit the road for good ....you dnt want your son thinking its okay to make another woman suffer the way you are suffering bc he wants to play daddy when its convienient for him...ya know 'to look good for the home-boys and the girl'....
    lechnermomof4

    Answer by lechnermomof4 at 12:29 PM on Oct. 28, 2010

  • i would take his ass to court for child support anyway! if he "doesn't do anything" after so long he'll get his license suspended and possible jail time. my ex isn't paying his child support.. he'll pay about $80 (if not less) right before the 30 day mark so i can't do anything about it! i hate that! so im hoping pretty soon i'll be able to do something about it. men can be jerks that can't take responsibility for their actions!!
    proudmommy690

    Answer by proudmommy690 at 10:43 PM on Oct. 27, 2010

  • if he is on the birth certificate, you need to take him to court ASAP. if he is, and you cut off contact, he can take YOU to court and YOU can get in trouble for not letting him see his son. and he can tell you all he wants that hes not gonna do anything if you go for CS, but he will HAVE to pay the support. if hes working, it will come straight out of his paycheck. if hes working, and getting paid under the table, he will have to come up with the money or he will lose his license or go to jail or both. plus, he will have to pay all the back support from the day the baby was born and (for most states) he will have to pay towards the hospital bills if you are on state aide. the courts wont mess around with him. he can try to play games all he wants, but all that will do is piss the judge off.
    racergirl7

    Answer by racergirl7 at 10:57 PM on Oct. 27, 2010

  • Take him to court straight away. If he won't pay, the gov't will do something about him!
    CarriePM

    Answer by CarriePM at 10:44 PM on Oct. 27, 2010

  • I dont think so at all but not as a permanent solution you will eventually have to talk to him or have an advocate and one you put him on child support he then will be entitled to visitation to the child. just some FYI
    jazmya_mom

    Answer by jazmya_mom at 10:44 PM on Oct. 27, 2010

  • mama you have to think of your son> If he is a danger to him then try to take legal action.
    but if not well a kid seems to still prefer a piss poor parent to none . Sorry you are going through this :)
    chica1965

    Answer by chica1965 at 11:48 PM on Oct. 27, 2010

  • ive been in this situation before and i went to child support enforcement office and made him pay cause he told me that if i went there he wouldnt pay so i proved him wrong. he doesnt have anything to do with his (my) three kids. He told his two youngest that they weren't his and i know 100% that he is all their fathers. men are jerks and assholes...well most men. Go to child support enforcement and get what you and the baby deserves!!!!!
    momma201176

    Answer by momma201176 at 11:59 PM on Oct. 27, 2010

  • Do what you have to do for your son and yourself. Your child is your main and only focus because my daughter is.
    ProudMommie83

    Answer by ProudMommie83 at 12:09 AM on Oct. 28, 2010

  • He's just giving you a reason to go to get child support for your son. In the state I live in, if the father doesn't pay, they can garnish his wages, take him to court, and take away his license. You should check out what the law is in your state for failure to pay child support. Go file and when you do tell them what he said, just so that they will know. There are ways that they can get him to pay. By the way, I bet he's supporting another woman.
    amessageofhope

    Answer by amessageofhope at 12:43 AM on Oct. 28, 2010

  • Only you can decide what's best for you and your son.
    However, he OWES your son that child support, and I'd advise
    taking him to court to get it. Multiple times, if you have to.
    LadyCash

    Answer by LadyCash at 2:45 AM on Oct. 28, 2010

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