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Would you stand by your friend for 9 months in a bad relationship?

Would you keep listening to your friend who is a bad relationship but does nothing to help herself?


Asked by Anonymous at 2:19 PM on Oct. 30, 2008 in Relationships

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Answers (14)
  • arrh i hate being friends with someone just like that. who whines and complains but never does anything. it's the hardest time to be a friend. would you want her to be there for you like that? i think so. do you ever tell her just to stop whining and do something or do you just listen? maybe you need to tell her that you can't take hearing her say all this stuff but never does anything cause you feel helpless and you can't change her man. that she needs to change her situation. that whining about it doesn't make it change. i think it's true that they won't change no matter what you say but i think she needs to see that whining really isn't helping you or her either. i would be honest and tell her how you need her stop but that you want to still be friends. that way she might stop whining and actually do something. seems cruel but you need to protect yourself too.

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:48 PM on Oct. 30, 2008

  • if you are really your friend you will still be by her and support her.

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:20 PM on Oct. 30, 2008

  • yes she needs you thats why she tells you all the thing she does she just needs to talk to somone she will find out on her own just stay there and be her friend and listen and give her advise

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:21 PM on Oct. 30, 2008

  • If she was truley my friend i would listen but I would also try to help her she may just feel alone and trapped!!

    Answer by scaredmommy08 at 2:28 PM on Oct. 30, 2008

  • yes you are her rock and she needs you trust me I am a domestic abuse survivor and a woman will not leave a man until she is ready no matter what anyone says

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:30 PM on Oct. 30, 2008

  • your friend may be scared and doesn't know where to start.. she might also be scared to` fail when she is on her own. but when my friend was in this problem i helpped her out and i also supported her, but my friend took lil steps so she can be relaxed and stable when she took the harder steps you might have to give a lil push here and there to let her realize how better she is..

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:34 PM on Oct. 30, 2008

  • i think some people just dont know what to do if they are in a bad relationship, most would say "just leave" well there's alot of other stuff one has to think about when you decide to leave, like is there kids? is it about the money? alot of other stuff too. i normally am around my mom and when i am, she complains alot about her divorced husband cause she's around him alot whether she likes it or not. Everytime she does complain, it kind of just goes in one ear and out the other, im not trying to be mean, but you hear it over and over, its gets kind of old, so one day it might get kind of old to you if you dont start asking her what she wants to do about it.

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:55 PM on Oct. 30, 2008

  • I come from a place of experience on this one. I was in a HORRIBLE abusive marriage for years. My friends knew what was going on and bless them they stayed by my side and offered encouragement until I had the strength to leave him. Not only were they by my side through it all they actually came and helped me moved and offered me a place to stay until I got on my feet. This may sound dramatic but I don't know that I would be alive if it weren't for them. I would stay by my friends side offering love and any support. Sometimes when we aren't strong enough we need other people to be strong for us.

    Answer by mrswright1170 at 3:52 PM on Oct. 30, 2008

  • Yes you should stick by your friend. She needs you more than you know. HOWEVER, if she keeps leaving and going back, or if her drama is starting to affect YOUR life, then sometimes you have to cut these friends out, or just give them a serious reality check. I've had both types of friends. You really have to look at the circumstances. For now, being her friend, give her some really sound, objective advice. Don't just be her sounding board to complain.

    Answer by hopelessnance at 4:12 PM on Oct. 30, 2008

  • It doesnt matter if it is 9 days, 9 weeks or 9 months, If you are really her friend of course you will listen and if you care you would realize by the fact that she is complaining that she is thinking about it. Give her suggestions which are usually the obvious thing but dont critisize. We all have bad relationships and we all need a friend when we go through bad times. That is how we know who real friends are and if you dont want to hear it then split so she can find a real friend to support her. You dont have to fake it we all understand sometimes our friends just cant be THE friend we need to get us through a situation.

    Answer by weirdjojo at 4:17 PM on Oct. 30, 2008