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My little girl has become possesed by the devil, what do I do?

Okay not really possesed but we are fighting all the time now. For some time she has got it in her head that I am the worst mom in history and all her little firends mom's are better(she has bluntly told me so). Many times she says she wishes I wasn't her mother and similar things. My husband and I are being strict on her with this but its only gotten a little better. We are fighting all the time and no matter what I tell her she gives me a smart mouth answer. I don't know what I can do for her to see me in a better light.

 
Taylor82

Asked by Taylor82 at 4:20 PM on Oct. 30, 2008 in School-Age Kids (5-8)

Level 3 (15 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (14)
  • sounds typical. don't play into it. when she says nasty things, just tell her when she's ready to be respectful then you will have a conversation. don't let her see you get upset or aggravated by her smart mouth - it's all part of the game. try to have conversations in between to find out what's upsetting her... she may just be testing limits, but my experience with my daughter is she acts out when she wants attention (she's 17 now... hasn't changed)... are you spending all your time arguing and punishing, or do you have special time set aside just for her? When my daughter was younger i read that just 15 solid minutes of undivided attention a day makes a big difference... it did.
    figaro8895

    Answer by figaro8895 at 4:41 PM on Oct. 30, 2008

  • ignore her little rants.....don't give her the satisfaction of yelling back...maybe tell her it hurts your feelings when she says those things
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:25 PM on Oct. 30, 2008

  • She is probably saying these things because you are not giving her what she wants,,toys food cloths,you know stuff she really want or wants to do..,,,,I would tell her you can hate me,,,wish I wasn't your mother all you want,,I love you,,But your still not going to get whatever you want,,and I'm still going to be your mother..I f doing this doesnt work I dont know what to say, good luck
    louise2

    Answer by louise2 at 4:29 PM on Oct. 30, 2008

  • well i'm not there yet, but a friend of mine, whenever her son yells that he hates her, she just yells "i love you" back at him.
    armywife43

    Answer by armywife43 at 4:31 PM on Oct. 30, 2008

  • When My four year old say he doesn't like me anymore I always tell him that I'm not real fond of him right now either but lucky for him I do love him...Other than that I am no help...I'm sure I will be there soon.
    But_Mommie

    Answer by But_Mommie at 4:34 PM on Oct. 30, 2008

  • Like others have said. It's an attempt to get a response. I wouldn't bother with the "I love you" thing because it is using 'love' passive aggressively. Which isn't good because it has the potential to taint the expression when it is sincere.

    What I would say is 'I'm sorry you feel that way, BUT it doesn't change anything. You are still going to do as I say.' Emotional blackmail is not a negotiating point. To allow the facts to be changed - or to quibble how things are because of someone not being happy about it is to let yourself be drawn into endless arguing. She can feel however she wants to feel, but as a parent you still have to do what you have to do. I wouldn't argue the feeling, since it is subjective, her prerogative and will change a hundred times in a week. She very well may feel that way, but it doesn't change anything.
    Kestrel1

    Answer by Kestrel1 at 8:25 PM on Oct. 30, 2008

  • Totally ignore it. I have a hyper-dramaful 5 year old who used to say thing like that. I'd just say, "Well, sorry you feel that way," and go on about my merry way.
    lilmami81

    Answer by lilmami81 at 12:49 AM on Oct. 31, 2008

  • It sounds like she is looking for attention and affection. She is trying to tell you something. I think you need to sit with her and talk to her without yelling. I also believe in positive reinforcement. Instead of always punishing her give her some positive responses.

    If you punish her make sure she understands why she is being punished. I have always made my children explain to me why they are punished that way if they are incorrect in their thinking then I can explain it to them.
    Good Luck
    cornflakegirl3

    Answer by cornflakegirl3 at 8:42 AM on Oct. 31, 2008

  • IMO, all children strive for attention, even if it's negative. i agree w/ the other mom's who posted to ignore her as long as she's not going to hurt herself or someone else because she'll eventually realize that her efforts to "take you there" aren't working and will stop. I know this because it's how we had to break all three of ours of the same thing. Although, we're still struggling w/ our ds somewhat and I'm convinced that boys are more stubborn than girls!!!!!
    LovingParent08

    Answer by LovingParent08 at 9:43 AM on Oct. 31, 2008

  • I used to be the same way as your daughter when I was a kid! Except I wasnt brave enough to tell my parents I hate them. Instead I would just flip them the bird as they walked away.

    Anyways, as someone who has been on the other side, continue laying down the law with her but also talk with her about why she feels the way she does(even if it is because she cant get/do what she wants. She needs to learn to talk about it "like a grown up)
    This rough time your family is going through wont end until she is at least 18 but it will be worth all the tears and stress. My mom and I didnt have much of a relationship when I was a kid. We werent able to mend it untill I moved out and that took a few years but we are close now.

    ICPclwnLOV

    Answer by ICPclwnLOV at 10:29 AM on Oct. 31, 2008

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