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4 Bumps

2nd, 3rd baby, baby showers?

My sister is pregnant with her 3rd child. No one in my family was expecting a baby shower but she's having one. Not only is it her 3rd child but her and her dh are very well off financially. She is a sahm and he's an engineer. The rest of my family and extended family and her dh's family are all just working class, paying the bills. On one hand I think its for the baby so who cares. But its just rubbed me the wrong way. It may just be her attitude. She's very snobby and thinks she's better than us because of where she lives, what she drives, what her husband makes and does for a living. I just think that if you can more than afford what you need, why have a shower?

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 2:11 AM on Oct. 29, 2010 in Parenting Debate

Answers (25)
  • Why can't you have a baby celebration? I mean, there is no harm in having a little get together with cake and recognizing the baby, making a belly cast, etc.

    As far as lavish gifts go, I wouldn't. But a pack of onesies if a very minimal cost, and it'd probably get the point across too =)

    Answer by Razelda at 2:14 AM on Oct. 29, 2010

  • Every baby deserves to be celebrated, not just the first... If she doesn't need anything, just get diapers or something along that line. But there is no reason not to celebrate the new baby just because she already has others...

    Answer by SabrinaMBowen at 2:39 AM on Oct. 29, 2010

  • I've never been bothered by a baby shower for subsequent babies. To me, it's a celebration of the impending birth, telling the parents you're excited and every baby can be honored. My boys love to look at pictures of their showers. I would have liked to been able to show my youngest pictures of a party in his honor, but we didn't have one, since no one thought a 3rd baby "needed a shower." We bought every thing we needed, any way. I didn't care that we didn't "get stuff," but I felt as if no one cared about our new addition. Heck a congratulations phone call would have been nice. :/ As for your sister....I'd buy a gift in your price range IF you wanted to. Nothing says you have to, especially if you don't get along.

    Answer by Mrs.B3 at 2:42 AM on Oct. 29, 2010

  • I knew of one girl who threw her own baby shower for her thir, (and she had everything from her prior kids, plus a military husband & her parents to help out).

    Answer by BlueSaphire at 2:51 AM on Oct. 29, 2010

  • I don't see a problem with it. I enjoy going to baby showers. I didn't have one for either of my children though. We haven't lived in this area very long and at the time, I didn't really know very many people anyway. I don't regret it. I didn't have a bridal shower either.....

    Answer by sherribeare at 4:05 AM on Oct. 29, 2010

  • Are they throwing their own shower?? If so, that is inappropriate!! If someone else is throwing it for them - go have fun. Get them some diapers or something. Every mom can always use those!

    Answer by micheledo at 6:12 AM on Oct. 29, 2010

  • we move to a different military post each time we have a baby ( seems to work out that way) and we have had 4 soon to be 5 showers. They shuldnt throw their own shower, but if DH throws it for her,that is okay too! I men if you have 2 girls n a row, and then a boy, and shower is appropriate

    Answer by JoLee12345 at 8:18 AM on Oct. 29, 2010

  • I know someone just threw herself a baby shower for her second. Her first just turned 2. It rubbed me the wrong way, because she was expecting gifts and invited over 100 people. I totally get celebrating the baby, but it was all about her. I had a shower (2 actually) with my second, but they were thrown by my home church and the new church we were going to in another state, after the baby was born, more for people to meet her.


    Answer by reflect1light at 8:23 AM on Oct. 29, 2010

  • If they're doing it as a celebration to welcome the baby that's fine. She should not be giving a shower for herself, and that's what it sounds like. A friend asked that no showers be given, that she had enough from previous birth, but she did have a "Baby's Here" party when the baby was a few weeks old and invited family and friends. It was more like an open house. It gave everyone a chance to see the baby, and gifts were not expected, though some people did bring a little something.

    Answer by SweetLuci at 8:44 AM on Oct. 29, 2010

  • I think in england baby showers are different.. they're a way of celebrating a new life... not for the mother if you get the difference. Baby showers aren't as common over here, but no-one cares if it's the first of 5th kid... a newborn always needs more things..... and they're quite often thrown by the parents.

    Answer by Piskie at 9:42 AM on Oct. 29, 2010

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