Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

For all you mothers that have had a miscarriage/s over a year ago, how are you coping with it today? Is there anything that has helped you move on?

I dont mean get over it because you will never get over it but just move on with a somewhat normal life.

Answer Question

Asked by cantmoveon at 6:17 PM on Oct. 29, 2010 in Pregnancy

Level 5 (65 Credits)
Answers (12)
  • i had a miscarriage in 2008, so it's been awhile. he would be 2.5 now. i still think about him often, but it's not as raw i guess. i had another baby in may 2009 and i think that helped. hang in there. time helps you cope and teaches you tricks to deal with the pain. time also provideds a new perspective on loss. {{{HUGS}}} pm me if you need to talk some more.

    Answer by rfurlongg at 6:27 PM on Oct. 29, 2010

  • I miscarried in 2004. It was really early on so I'm fine with it now, but at the time it was upsetting. About a month afterward, I was at a store and saw a really sweet, soft newborn footed sleeper that was green with a little duck on it. I stood in the store and held it for a really long time, then bought it. I went out of the store and sat in my car and cried for a while, and that's when I started being ok. I decided that I would get pregnant again and when I had my baby, I would bring him or her home from the hospital in that sleeper. The next year, I had my youngest son and he was perfect and healthy and wore that sleeper home.

    Answer by JulieJacobKyle at 6:32 PM on Oct. 29, 2010

  • Throughout my reproductive years I miscarried many time. It is something that you carry with you but with the hopeful healthy birth of other children it diminishes.However years later I yearn for the ones I should have had.

    Answer by mom2priceboys at 6:39 PM on Oct. 29, 2010

  • I've had 3 miscarriages. The only thing that has really helped me is time and knowing that it wasn't my fault, oh and talking about it. Talk about it until you can't anymore! Its helps, I promise. Its always going to be painful, but you have to learn to pick up and move forward. I am so sorry that your going through this. I wish I could do more to help.

    Answer by hmhmom at 6:40 PM on Oct. 29, 2010

  • Wow u ladies r great. I did think as far as feeling a great deal of relief once I would get pregnant again n carry out that pregnancy successfully but never thought about buying something in remembrance of my angel that next baby can have. Love u ladies already. Thx a bunch

    Comment by cantmoveon (original poster) at 6:46 PM on Oct. 29, 2010

  • My son was born with complications. He's better now. After my m/c w my 2nd pregnancy I believed my body knew this pregnancy was not healthy for me and for my baby. I never mourned the m/c bcuz I remembered all da hard decisions moms (including myself) had to make in da NICU.

    Answer by Vero0724 at 6:56 PM on Oct. 29, 2010

  • It's important to grieve for that baby. I did not until years later and then I felt "freed", for lack of a better term. HUG

    Answer by Anonymous at 6:56 PM on Oct. 29, 2010

  • It wasn't really in remembrance. Sort of the opposite, I guess. I let go of the baby I didn't get. The sleeper was something that I could touch that said I would have a healthy baby in the future. It made me heal and start looking forward to the baby I knew I would get someday.

    Answer by JulieJacobKyle at 7:09 PM on Oct. 29, 2010

  • I had a miscarriage about a month before I became pregnant with my son.... It was devastating at the time, but what I had was a blighted ovum, which means the gestational sac developed, but the fetus never did. That helped me get over it, the knowledge that I never really lost a "baby", if that makes sense....

    Answer by Anouck at 7:35 PM on Oct. 29, 2010

  • It's really hard at first but then as time goes on it gets better. I let myself grieve and then tried keeping myself busy. Even now that I'm pregnant again and this pregnancy is going so well. I still think about those other babies I lost and it still hurts. At first I blamed myself wondering what I could of done different and then I realize it wasn't my fault. I got a new doctor and they have helped me out a lot better then my last ob/gyn did.

    Answer by ladyambition at 10:23 PM on Oct. 29, 2010

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.