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Were you wondering about the girl with the 3 month old baby? I have an update for you!!

The woman and her DH got into a fight, both were arrested but the mom was able to bail herself out again right away for $200.00 - thankfully the baby was ok. The mom called everyone she knew (according to the police sgt I talked to) and had only one person left to call for help. Me. She was afraid I was mad at her so she asked the sgt to call me. He explained the situation and told me she's been on the phone for over an hour trying to find someone to help her. She and the baby had no where to go. I made sure the DH was going to be staying in jail and he is - probably 6 mos at least but more likely 12 mos. I picked up this girl and her baby - but I made it clear that she had to be working and looking for an apt. She got one today and has been picking up more hours. She asked to be put on the night shift to make $2 more an hour. I told her I will watch the baby for free for now - I don't want her going back to him thinking she

 
Babylove76

Asked by Babylove76 at 9:02 PM on Oct. 30, 2010 in Relationships

Level 21 (10,227 Credits)
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Answers (13)
  • she needs to prioritize and make sure that everything she does is for her child well being and hers as well...cuz he will get out and he knows how to pull her back in...she lost something great due to him and you know what i am talking about...i think things DO NOT happen over night but i think the path does become a little more clear...this is not an easy road she has...so just by her doing a few things here and there YOU DON'T LET YOUR GUARDS DOWN... remember PEOPLE CHANGE BUT PEOPLE MANIPULATE AS WELL...she needs somebody and she knows how you are...you stick to your rules and KEEP YOUR GUARDS UP AT ALL TIMES MAMA...wish you the best...

    iNk-FrEaK

    Answer by iNk-FrEaK at 11:22 PM on Oct. 30, 2010

  • AWESOME!! another DV situation helped by a Good soul YOU. my friend came out of NOWHERE to help me this past summer. i stayed there fo rtwo months. You and she and tohers liek you are definitely goign to heaven., my child was 3 1/2 months old. she needs to get on her feet and she will but we are in shock, like i am just coming out of the shock part even with counselling and dv counselling. ive already been to court and situation is stabilizing. i have a Protective order. god bless you and be patient and supportive of frined obviously
    silverelf

    Answer by silverelf at 9:05 PM on Oct. 30, 2010

  • That is amazingly nice of you to take her and her baby in! I hope she keeps going in the right direction and that asshole gets what he deserves.
    VRocsMommy

    Answer by VRocsMommy at 9:17 PM on Oct. 30, 2010

  • Why did she go to jail?
    itsallabtthem84

    Answer by itsallabtthem84 at 9:04 PM on Oct. 30, 2010

  • you know your doing an amazing job...you have a heart of gold...a lot of times women live with an abuser and have been torn and by the time his not in the picture due to whatever reason this women still live by the hell they was put threw...she needs to built a support system/group for herself so that she can be strong and continue to stay strong... verbal abuse is no deferent from physical...words hurt as much as hits...

    iNk-FrEaK

    Answer by iNk-FrEaK at 11:22 PM on Oct. 30, 2010

  • way to goThat's for you, and her! That's so good to hear! I hope she sticks with it, and doesn't fall back into a trap with him. But it sounds like she's got a really good support system with you and your DH, so hopefully that won't happen.

    Raine2001

    Answer by Raine2001 at 11:46 PM on Oct. 30, 2010

  • doesn't have to pay him - I just want her to stay away from DH as he is extremely violent. I did a background check on him and he has 4 people who've taken 4 yr restraining orders out on him. He has multiple battery convictions and I personally am freaked out by this guy. I told her I will always help the baby, but if she wants to have my help other than baby sitting (such as staying with me right now til she can move into her apt) she needs to stay away from him and work on taking care of her baby and herself. She's made a lot of progress already: going back on her anti-depressant meds he refused to let her take, getting her lease completed for her new apt and working. I am pretty proud of her and she's now beginning to accept compliments. She wore makeup to work today for the 1st time - he wouldn't let her "look like a cheap whore". I told her she looked really pretty and she began to cry!
    Babylove76

    Comment by Babylove76 (original poster) at 9:03 PM on Oct. 30, 2010

  • No one has ever told her that before. She needs a lot of encouragement and is now finally getting it. My DH has adopted the baby as "grandpa" cuz his oldest dd is the same age as this young lady. She's helped us quite a bit helping our girls with homework, doing basic housework, so she's fitting in nicely. Thank you everyone for your prayers....keep her and baby (and us!) in your thoughts and prayers in the coming days and weeks that she continue to work on herself and her children. I will continue babysitting for her as I so enjoy her little baby! She's a real delight to have!
    The other crap going on around here seems to have died down for now, so we are finally getting some peace! I just hope it lasts til I find a new place to go!
    Babylove76

    Comment by Babylove76 (original poster) at 9:05 PM on Oct. 30, 2010

  • silverelf - I have been there many many many times myself (dv) and there were so many times when I desperately needed help and had no one. I don't want anyone to be in that position! In order to leave my abuser I have had to live in my car more than I care to count! I am so glad you had someone to help you. I truly believe in "pay it forward" and as I tell her when she can't understand why I am doing this for her - there will come a day when you need to be an "angel" for someone. Just be ready and willing when God calls! :) God bless you sweetie!
    Babylove76

    Comment by Babylove76 (original poster) at 9:12 PM on Oct. 30, 2010

  • She went to jail because BOTH she and her husband were fighting and the county where they were at the time takes both.
    Babylove76

    Comment by Babylove76 (original poster) at 9:13 PM on Oct. 30, 2010

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