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Okay I have a problem on my hands now,my now 13 yr old daughter keeps asking if she can have a boyfriend,I have insisted that she can't have a boyfriend but that she is allowed to have a guy as a friend. I told her that she doesnt need to be serious about boys cause she is too young and theirs a lot of problems that come with young love like heart break which sucks miserably,and sex is always on a guys mind,and then unplanned pregnancies. I did something I shouldnt have done tonight,I dropped two girls and my son and two other boys off at the mall so they could go trick or treating I assumed they would behave especially with my son their. Another girl called with her cousin and wanted to meet up with them at the mall so we did and I walked in with them to go find them and,,low and behold I found my son who was alone and I asked him where the others were and he said he knew where they were and led me outside where I

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Asked by MarGeee at 9:58 PM on Oct. 30, 2010 in Teens (13-17)

Level 20 (9,059 Credits)
Answers (11)
  • found them kissing. I thought with her brother being their they wouldnt do anything inappropriate but they did. I'm so disappointed in myself for making such a dumb decision. I dont want my daughter sneaking around but in the long run I think she's gonna do whatever she wants regardless of what I say or feel.

    Comment by MarGeee (original poster) at 10:01 PM on Oct. 30, 2010

  • you didnt make a mistake, shes just growing up. id help her all i could and be supportive and set some ground rules for this whole dating thing, gl

    Answer by meagan678 at 10:04 PM on Oct. 30, 2010

  • try to have the boyfriend over at your house, they can spent time together but supervised by adult
    of course after a good long time of grounded

    good luck!

    Answer by fiatpax at 10:07 PM on Oct. 30, 2010

  • I don't blame you...I would be very upset if my daughters had lied and were kissing boys at that young age. Fortunately ,they didn't. Since your daughter has,....its time to have some serious talks....stress that she should be thinking about school, education, girl friends, studying,school activities,etc, and not kissing boys. And she needs to stop lying. It is important to let her know that getting involved physically with boys should wait until she is an adult and in a reationship ... Good luck!

    Answer by kerp1960 at 10:10 PM on Oct. 30, 2010

  • Let her get knocked up, then call MTV. Sadly, she'd make more money than most people with actual jobs.

    Answer by mybabybugssmile at 10:12 PM on Oct. 30, 2010

  • You can't keep them apart, they will find any way they can. You have to find a way to supervise without hovering. She would be grounded, not for the kissing...but for breach of trust. She has to learn right now that if you can't believe her, you can't trust her..and she won't have much freedom that way.

    Answer by GrnEyedGrandma at 10:13 PM on Oct. 30, 2010

  • So this is just my opinion...My mom was open with me and I was open with her and she straight up told me that she knew I was going to do stuff and she'd rather know instead of me sneaking around and doing it behind her back...when I was in 8th grade she told me she knew Id get a bf in a few years and probably have sex so she wanted me to be open with her and tell her she could get me on birth control. I had a good relationship with my mom and since she was like that it made me not want to do stuff...My cousin on the other hand had a very strict mom who was really churchy. Well my cousin partied and was drunk one night and said she's already slept with like 30+ guys and then her brother is now 16 and he's on probation and just got sent off for the 2nd time for failing a drug test. I think you need to talk and have a good relationship and not be too strict and then the kids wont want to go out and do stuff. Just my opinion.

    Answer by misspriss_1987 at 10:43 PM on Oct. 30, 2010

  • Because I'm the type that woulda done stuff out of spite if my mom told me not to do it.

    Answer by misspriss_1987 at 10:44 PM on Oct. 30, 2010

  • Yes, your daughter will do whatever she wants regardless, no matter WHO is there. No matter how many restrictions you put on her, regardless. I think the best thing in this situation is to just try and educate her, and get her on some birth control so that things don't get worse. If you don't, she could possibly end up pregnant. Good luck!

    Answer by SAMNMAYASMOM at 3:24 AM on Oct. 31, 2010

  • I have to agree with misspriss, I have 2 girls, one is 17 and the other 13, I have always told them to be honest with me and I will be with them. ( for the most part!) Anyway, when my older girl started getting interested in boys we had the first of many conversations about what was expected of her and was not. It is silly to think that she wouldn't try things and it is natural to wonder. But to have her do things behind my back is worse than what she could be doing. This is the age that it starts, weather we like it or not. She has shown you that she is going to do what she wants regardless of you, and I had that too. If you haven't already, have lots of talks with her. Don't think it is too soon. it is not.

    Answer by wallmom1 at 12:01 PM on Oct. 31, 2010

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