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4 Bumps

How would you punish your son for this? Having sex when he is supposed to watch his sister

My 16 year old son was left in charge of watching his baby sister while my husband and i went to the hospital to be with our 15 year old who is in ICU. My daughter is 6 mind you well come to find out my son brought his girlfriend over and had sex because my hubby more or less caught them in the act when we got home. I am not so much mad about the sex as i am about the fact he didn't bother watching his sister and he left her to fend for herself. My hubby is acting like its not a big deal but i think it is. I am upset about the sex just don't know how to go about that one. What would you do here? Advice?

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Asked by Anonymous at 3:05 AM on Oct. 31, 2010 in General Parenting

Answers (12)
  • well I would make sure she is not allowed to come over for a while, and he isnt allowed to go to her house. It kind of surprises me sometimes how some parents dont want to dicipline their children because they dont want to be "mean" Im so mean I would probably also take his door off his room and take away hispriveleges

    most also note that my son is only 4, but my dh and I were pretty much in your sons shoes and I am still surprised my parents didnt punish me.

    Answer by cassie_kellison at 3:18 AM on Oct. 31, 2010

  • WOW I AM SO AMAZED how dad dealing with this ,he didn't mind that his 16yr son had sex ,so if his daughter turns 16 what will he do then lock her in her room for life,your son was wrong to bring in his girl friend how dare he have sex in your home,his job was to look after his sister while you where out ,and a 6yr can get into every thing ,now on you will have to get baby sitter for him and his sister,while you go see your other child in the hospital ,and alone time his girl friend should come over is when you are there other then that she has to stay home and i would talk to her mom and tell whats be going on at your house ,i think she needs to know

    Answer by dutchcanadain at 3:38 AM on Oct. 31, 2010

  • The last thing i would do is not allow them to see one another because that will cause more of problems then we are starting with right now. I would give him a punishment that he would not want to EVER not allow his sister to fed for herself ever again. For having sex well i would have a long talk with them both and make sure that they both understand that having a child is a huge responsibility and he couldn't handle watching his 6 yrs old sister how is he gonna handle raising and watch a baby.


    Answer by raemommy at 4:27 AM on Oct. 31, 2010

  • I have a 6yr old, and he is not like a small child, he can take care of himself and I dont have to worry about him drowning in the potty or dumping the milk all over the kitchen. You are just trying to be angry about that bc you dont want to deal with the sex. I dont blame you! I would have had that girl call her father to come get her, and then I would have made them both tell him what they were doing while you were gone. Nothing worse than that....the girls daddy is some scary shit man. He is going to do it again, but he needs to find somewhere else, because its just wrong to do that in your parents house.

    Answer by LuvMyMedic3ID at 6:45 AM on Oct. 31, 2010

  • I just want to say ,,, I am sorry for what your going through. I hope your child in the ICU gets better...

    Answer by kileighsmommie at 8:16 AM on Oct. 31, 2010

  • I'd make him stay within 5 feet of a parent at all times for at least a week and no technology whatsoever for at least two weeks.

    Answer by Fistandantalus at 8:21 AM on Oct. 31, 2010

  • I would talk to her parents too. Did they use birth control? How about some in your face facts on std's including pictures. Sex at 16 is not ok.

    Answer by motherofhope98 at 10:43 AM on Oct. 31, 2010

  • call the girls parents, let them in the situation. maybe the talk with their child will open her eyes too to what she was doing.

    Answer by angevil53 at 10:47 AM on Oct. 31, 2010

  • I wouldn't be upset about the sex... He's 16, as long as the were doing things safely, I don't see an issue. Now, my question would be how long was the girl alone? At 6 even if she was alone for an hour it's not a big deal... I would be upset that he felt he needed to sneak around and do these things when we weren't home, but I don't see his actions as any real threat to the sister either. I would say he needs to understand that he broke your trust, and that is the issue. That when he's left home to watch his sister, he should be doing just that and not feel that he needs to be sneaky about things. Although I can't really say I would punish the behavior either... I don't think I would have done much different at that age.

    Answer by SabrinaMBowen at 11:13 AM on Oct. 31, 2010

  • Im not sure what I would do... but it would be HUGE!

    1) had sex
    2) exposed his 6 yr old to immoral behavior
    3) didnt watch his 6 yr old sister
    4) you were not on a date... you were in ICU with the other sib
    5) doesnt show ANY respect for ANYone in the family.

    HUGE HUGE HUGE issue for me.

    best of luck... with him and the child in ICU

    Answer by sahlady at 12:39 PM on Oct. 31, 2010

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