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What do you think about cheap friends?

I have one particular friend that is like this and it kinda aggrivates me it makes me feel like she's not being very thoughtful or cares. I remember one time for my last baby shower she got me 2 baby rags and a towel. Its funny though cause whenever she throws a bday, house warming ect she expects me to get her alot which i usually do cause this is what i do for all of my friends, i really enjoy to go shopping for my friends but this is getting old. Im starting to think i should stop getting so much, and do what she does to me, and see what she thinks. Its not like shes broke and she has no kids so what do you think i should do?

 
iluvmykidsxoxo

Asked by iluvmykidsxoxo at 10:21 AM on Oct. 31, 2010 in Relationships

Level 20 (8,727 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (14)
  • Give what you give out of the goodness of your heart, but don't go broke doing it. Accept what your friend gives as the best she will do and enjoy her friendship.
    scout_mom

    Answer by scout_mom at 11:00 AM on Oct. 31, 2010

  • I don't judge people's gifts. I have had a baby shower where no one showed up. I didn't care about the gifts. You give a gift because it's what you want to do, out of the kindness of your heart. Not to put a price tag on what others will give you in return. There should not be conditions on gifts, or else it's not really a gift.
    Musicmom80

    Answer by Musicmom80 at 10:23 AM on Oct. 31, 2010

  • I know someone like that this person thinks now that I am down this person claims I am using them if I stay away but everything comes out of my pocket when I have the money. So I am letting this person go.
    pinkdragon36

    Answer by pinkdragon36 at 10:28 AM on Oct. 31, 2010

  • I had a cheap friend for years and yes it gets old fast. I loved her so much and would give her all sorts of wonderful gifts that I could not afford because she meant so much to me. It never was returned. Her idea of a great gift was giving us discount coupons that she got through her company free. Anyway, I stopped with the expensive gifts and started to give more realistic gifts or would simply take her to lunch at a place of my choosing.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:32 AM on Oct. 31, 2010

  • Perhaps she cannot afford the big things. I have never choosen a friend because of the gifts they buy me. Thats not what freindship is about. You may not know her entire situation either. If your upset, and you are real friends do the right thing and talk to her about it.
    RheaF

    Answer by RheaF at 10:36 AM on Oct. 31, 2010

  • Possibly she does not know what to get you? Maybe she is not as good at shopping and knows you are. If you shop a lot possibly you may be hard to shop for. So possibly next time give suggestions or subtle hints. But I agree..it is the thought that counts. Just the mere thought that someone thought about you should be enough. If you give, do not expect anything in return except that you made them happy. Happy is your reward.
    I have someone close to me that would give me beautiful and very expensive gifts. When I could not "match" the gift she disowned me. You know it was not my choice that she gave these things to me. It really hurt me and I almost do not like receiving gifts anymore.
    Momforhealth

    Answer by Momforhealth at 10:39 AM on Oct. 31, 2010

  • what it comes down to for me is, can she AFFORD it? My brother works 3 jobs. Hes single and lives with my other brother. always has the latest IPhone and drives a BMW (that he paid cash for, he won 25,000 on a scratch off) Needless to say he has money. BUT he ALWAYS buys my kids CRAP from the dollar store for their birthdays. He came over on Christmas eve last year and didnt buy them ANYTHING. It pisses me off bc i KNOW he can afford more, but he chooses not to. Now my mom, shes disabled on a fixedf income so i dont care how much she spends because i know she has very little. for me if you can afford to buy nice and you dont then i have a HUGE issue with that. If you dont and cant then i would continue spending what i want to spend and feel good about it.
    MiMi.

    Answer by MiMi. at 10:43 AM on Oct. 31, 2010

  • From your recent post it sounds like she is indeed using you. You might want to rethink this friendship.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:47 AM on Oct. 31, 2010

  • The cheap gifts would not bother me....but it would bother me if someone expected expensive gifts from me...and if she is pointin things out and asking you to get them, I would consider that to be rude and would not comply...
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:58 AM on Oct. 31, 2010

  • I dont have friends like that.


    BUT.... I HATE people who nit pick over a restaurant bill.... if they are unwilling to just split it by the number of people... Im unwilling to go.... really we are going to quibble over a dollar or two when we could have just had a wonderful conversation and a great meal???

    sahlady

    Answer by sahlady at 11:04 AM on Oct. 31, 2010