Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

1 Bump

MIL teaching ds to say love you jesus...

And "thank you jesus for this food" before eating. He's 2, I was raised Buddhist, my mother and brothers are Buddhist, and I find this highly offensive. He stays with her two nights and days out of the month, (his dad isn't able to take him). I wouldn't want to disrupt this relationship, so how do I polietly tell her I am not comfortable with this.

Answer Question

Asked by gypsymama532 at 1:04 PM on Oct. 31, 2010 in Religion & Beliefs

Level 16 (2,932 Credits)
Answers (16)
  • You are just going to have to tell her straight up to knock it off. I'm sorry you're having this issue :(

    Answer by VeggieMuslima at 1:15 PM on Oct. 31, 2010

  • Tell her you know that I am Buddhist and I find it offensive, please discontinue this. Is there a word that can be used that would encompass both religions? I am sorry she is being insensitive.

    Answer by tootoobusy at 1:16 PM on Oct. 31, 2010

  • I agree, just tell her as polite as possible. maybe something like, I understand and appechiate the intention, but you want your son to be raised this and that way. Having said that she should do nothing else but respect your wish. If she doesn't ... well, I hope she does because parenting styles can cause a lot of trouble between parents and grandparents. You are, however, the mother and you're in charge!

    Answer by BeachMom81 at 1:20 PM on Oct. 31, 2010

  • The minute you say 'offensive' that is going to be the definition of this relationship for a very lng time. You will immediately raised her christian hackles...count on it. Wouldn't it be easier to teach him things from the Buddist relgion at the same time? She only has him 2 days a month, and he's 2...If you override her beliefs with your own for 28 days...which do you think he'll remember and likely repeat at her house? I'm not saying you don't have reason to be upset...I just think there is a much more productive way around it without calling out the 'religion ploice".

    Answer by GrnEyedGrandma at 1:23 PM on Oct. 31, 2010

  • I always thought that kids should be exposed to ALL religions so that they can chose what they feel is right for them when they are grown up.

    Answer by kerp1960 at 1:25 PM on Oct. 31, 2010

  • I agree with you, GrnEyedGrandma.

    Answer by kerp1960 at 1:26 PM on Oct. 31, 2010

  • I would NOT use the word offensive to her and maybe just let her know you do not feel he is old enough yet to be exposed to that kind of thing and would prefer she wait for a while before doing it. Does she even know you are Buddhist? If not and you mention it that could cause a huge problem. I would avoid telling her you don't want him raised Christian for now and just make it clear you do not want him exposed to any of it yet.

    Answer by aeneva at 1:48 PM on Oct. 31, 2010

  • I think you can talk to her without using the word offensive. I think first you need to look at why it bothers you. For me I like that my children know things about many different religions. You need to have a conversation with her, although you need to be open minded and let her know that you are not comfortable with some of the things she is teaching him.

    I think it is a very hard position to be in because he is little and does not understand some things. You don't want to take him away from her, although you want her to respect you. So I think when you talk to her you have to go in with the same level of respect for her that you expect her to give you/.

    Good Luck!

    Answer by cornflakegirl3 at 1:54 PM on Oct. 31, 2010

  • I would probably avoid the word ofensive, and tell her you're not comfortable with it and don't want him saying it.

    Answer by JulieJacobKyle at 2:16 PM on Oct. 31, 2010

  • I would just tell her, honesty is always the best thing, just be careful with your wording.

    Answer by LiLJeni at 2:42 PM on Oct. 31, 2010

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.