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4 Bumps

Ugg, why would you even say that...

So my parents are great people, I am very close to them... but lately they are starting to push it. First I want to say I do believe in God, I dont go to church right now, but I dont believe that I have to go to church to believe or to pray.

growing up we would go for awhile, and then sleep in and not get back on track... we just were not very religous-y ( it was known we believe in God but wouldnt pray together or anything like that ).


They are "born again Chrsitians" they are literally obsessed with their new church. Whcih is fine but they keep trying to push it on me . For example my husband lost his job and today are car broke down, their response is that " It wouldnt have happened if we went to church" ( whcih technically I have gone to church with them twice, right before both of those things happened- just saying) .

I didnt like it, the Rev. cries, screams, & yells Hallaluah every other word. Just not for us

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 1:20 AM on Nov. 1, 2010 in Relationships

Answers (7)
  • I apologize for how your parents are acting. First I understand that their church is not for you and your right you dont have to go to church to beleive and pray. Church is a place christians go to gather to worship and praise GOD. But its also a way for us to fellowship and share our experiences with other christians so we"ll know we are not alone when challenging things happen in our lives. We all have things happen in our lives regarless if we go to church and I just want to tell you to remember "Seek and you shall find, Knock and it shall be opened, ask and it shall be given, we have not because we ask not" when you pray remember to ask for what you need and want. You might not get it when you want it but you'll get it on time. When God leads you to the right church you'll know it.
    suelo74

    Answer by suelo74 at 1:30 AM on Nov. 1, 2010

  • With religion it is one of the hardest strains on relationships at least that is what I have found. My Mom is part of an extreme Christian group and I was raised within that faith and have gone in a different direction. I even joined the military which is against what they believe in and I was disfellowshipped. Anyways the mean well with it. And truly they think it will save your soul so that is why they are so pushy it is because they love you that much. I try to look at it from that standpoint. Bad timing yes. Inconsiderate yes but in the end they say and do it because they love you.
    Melbornj

    Answer by Melbornj at 1:32 AM on Nov. 1, 2010

  • Dh and I dont go to church that often either but we pray 2gether. I dont think every church.is for every person. Dh really cant deal with screaming and shouting whereas I was brought up that way so it doesn't bother me. Of think your parents are pushing their ideals on you
    4xsthetrouble

    Answer by 4xsthetrouble at 1:35 AM on Nov. 1, 2010

  • Being a Christian doesn't save you from things like your car breaking down, and your Born-Again parent should know that. I would show your parents this verse:

    1 Peter 1:6–7
    6 In this you greatly rejoice, though now for a little while you may have had to suffer grief in all kinds of trials. 7 These have come so that your faith—of greater worth than gold, which perishes even though refined by fire—may be proved genuine and may result in praise, glory and honor when Jesus Christ is revealed.

    God knows what is in your heart, not your parents. Though I'm sure they only mean well...
    fireeyes81

    Answer by fireeyes81 at 6:25 AM on Nov. 1, 2010

  • You didnt say how old you are or if you live with your parents or not. If you still live with your parents then you abide by their rules in their house. If your gown and live on your own then the parents need to tend to their own door step and let you attend to yours - so to speak. Explain to them lovingly that now that your gown you'd like to find your own way. Dont discuss religion with them. If its brought up, just say Mom/Dad thank you for being such wonderful leaders in my life and leave it at that. Then change the subject or excuse yourself until the conversation is changed. Often when we are excited about something we forget ourselves. I dont think that they are trying to shove it on you. They are your parents so its hard to change into different nurturing levels as you the kids mature and we parents forget ourselves & our places...sometimes. I know, Im often guilty of this. Its hard to see your children as adults
    lacyjones

    Answer by lacyjones at 9:52 AM on Nov. 1, 2010

  • lacy... if she has a husabdna nd their car broke down, etc... I doubt they live with her paretns considering it just sounds as if she is out on her own in the adult world.
    As far as your issues go I know a ton of Christians who still have financila issues and such and I H-A-T-E to hear the words, "It wouldn't have happened if you went to church, etc". I mean COME ON! So, you get punished by God for not going to church? You ONLY have issues when you aren't a Christian or follow the organized religion? Whatever.
    If you aren't 100% into it then it isn't for you and it isn't going to help you. I know it's not for me.
    Memigen

    Answer by Memigen at 10:00 AM on Nov. 1, 2010

  • Growing up I never went to church, my parents were not interested in going. I have friends who were raised in church, they've always accepted me and told me the doors to their church are always open. I have friends who are new to religion and they are virulent in their mission to convert and save everyone they know and meet. Saying if I don't see things their way I'll "burn in hell"! The born agains are really a lot less tolerant (in my experience)! I had a friend that found her church to be wonderful, I like it, but it lacks what I want for my children. She took it quite personally and it has cooled our friendship! I think you need to let your parents know their church isn't for you but you are still looking. As for the car breaking down and other mishaps, in my life when we are steady in church things are better :o).
    Austinsmom35

    Answer by Austinsmom35 at 1:47 PM on Nov. 3, 2010

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