Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

My Baby's Daddy is still a kid.

I had my daughter almost 3 months ago. I found out that i was pregnant after 2 months gestation and my family and his family all talk about the baby ALL THE TIME. Yet now that she's here, he's still just a kid. It's like adulthood hasnt slapped him in the face yet. He hasn't tried to get a job and he still sits at home and plays video games all day. I am 17 and after giving up on him trying to get a job i quit school and now i'm working at McDonalds. I don't want to leave him but he needs to grow up. What do I do?

Answer Question
 
TehHannah

Asked by TehHannah at 2:56 AM on Nov. 1, 2010 in General Parenting

Level 5 (74 Credits)
Answers (10)
  • You need to shock him by telling him if he
    cant provide for u and the baby u need a break,
    its not fair to you to be the only worker its too hard
    mellibear

    Answer by mellibear at 3:08 AM on Nov. 1, 2010

  • You don't have to break up just tel him that he needs to think about what he really wants
    mellibear

    Answer by mellibear at 3:09 AM on Nov. 1, 2010

  • To Mellibear:

    Yea but if i do that then he'll be like "fine leave then" and get all pissed off. I really want Lily to grow up knowing her dad and I love him very very much.
    TehHannah

    Comment by TehHannah (original poster) at 3:12 AM on Nov. 1, 2010

  • O ok well I don't kno... that is wat I woud do. Ur daughter can still c her dad but he needs to understand he hs a responsibilty now and its time to grow up
    mellibear

    Answer by mellibear at 3:23 AM on Nov. 1, 2010

  • Listen sweetie you need to worry about you and your little one what your BF does and how he acts if he doesn't want to man up then you can't make him he mothers sounds like she is just a nose bag you need to go to the Welfare office sign up for everything you can and then tell them you need to leave where you are at and they will help you and your DD get into a place you need to worry about TWO PEOPLE INTHIS WORLD THAT'S YOUR DAUGHTER AND YOURSELF. If there is to much help from one person and none from another then you need to be the adult and take care of the issues that your are just not happy with. If you don't mind me asking WHhere are your parents? amily?
    raemommy

    Answer by raemommy at 4:25 AM on Nov. 1, 2010

  • My mom and dad live in the same town. But they live in a one bedroom apartment and thats just not big enough for them and my daughter and I. I have nowhere else to go.
    TehHannah

    Comment by TehHannah (original poster) at 5:19 AM on Nov. 1, 2010

  • Get away from him, if not you will end up pregnant again and it will be even harder to leave. He is not going to change. There are better men out there, and you and your baby deserve better. Please leave! I have watched my sister go through this, and it is not fun!!
    LuvMyMedic3ID

    Answer by LuvMyMedic3ID at 5:59 AM on Nov. 1, 2010

  • my DH has raised my son since he was 1, and we now have 4 more kds together, and my son calls him dad. His io-dad is a weed smoking, on working, living off ranom females type of guy. He wnders, never calls, and when he does it is in the summer when his mom is gonna get my son for a couple wekks, he doesnt send cads or gift, and i never have asked for child support b/c he snt on the birth certificate, and if i had him pay, he would POSSIBLY get some rights, and he does not deserve any! He is loser, and when I found out I was preg. with my son I left his dad behind, and gotmy life together. Now I have agreat husband,. and bio-dad, lives in a run down huse with some girl, and is broke, and lonely. If I would have not left, I mght be there too! Good luck
    JoLee12345

    Answer by JoLee12345 at 9:29 AM on Nov. 1, 2010

  • Leave him even if its just to scare him ... But if it doesn't work be prepared to not go back. You have to put your child before him and if he's not going to provide or be a good dad then you need to go as hard as it is. Good Luck.
    mlmsm928

    Answer by mlmsm928 at 1:42 PM on Nov. 1, 2010

  • Some men take longer to take their responsibility seriously. No matter what anyone says you won't leave him til you get ready and you don't sound ready. Just keep doing what your doing take care of yourself and your baby. I had achild at 17 also and no matter how hard i tried at the end it still didn't work out. Eventually we went our seperate ways and i took care of my child by myself. We even stayed in homeless shelters. But I learned to stand on my own to feet. Look into government housing and assistance. You can do it by your self if you have to I should know been where you are. I'm married now 16 years and have three more children and this time i got a prize. He loves us and takes care of us. Pray asking GOD to guide you in your life and may he bless you!
    suelo74

    Answer by suelo74 at 1:19 AM on Nov. 2, 2010

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.