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2 Bumps

IS THE SCHOOL MAKING TOO MUCH OUT OF THIS?

My son was in the guidance councilors office for having gotten into a fight with another boy... PUNCHING EACH OTHER... OVER A GIRL.. OY VEY. 8years old and it starts..(sigh)

When he grabbed scisors and cuts off a peice of his hair..(my son did this to himself) In my opinion.. He made a rash choice.. no biggie.. mommy is letting him have to wear it that way this week.. and then will have his hair cut this weekend..
But the school now is saying he is a "danger to himself.. he supposedly has "cutter" tendancies"

UM.. AM I THE ONLY ONE TO THINK.. I HAVE SEEN THOUSANDS OF KIDS CUT THEIR OWN HAIR.. INCLUDING HAVING DONE IT MYSELF AS A KID.. MY SISTERS, BROTHERS AND FRIENDS.. ALL SAY THEY DID IT..

SO WHAT DO YOU THINK??

 
MAKEMYDAY101

Asked by MAKEMYDAY101 at 8:25 AM on Nov. 3, 2010 in School-Age Kids (5-8)

Level 13 (1,302 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (21)
  • This was an "acting out" behavior. This was his losing control and not knowing what to do with his emotions. This IS outside the range of normal. He has now screamed "I need help" ... the school has recognized this. You can claim that you think they're making too big a deal out of it if you so choose, but no, the school is not making too much out of this. This IS a big deal and IS an indicator of a serious problem.

    That said, does it mean he has "cutter tendencies"? Maybe, maybe not ... the reality is, the school isn't qualified to make that assessment.
    aliceinalgonac

    Answer by aliceinalgonac at 12:29 PM on Nov. 3, 2010

  • considering his father just left our home less than a month ago.. and other family issues.. I am not terribly worried about the fact he is having anger issues.. But yes.. I understand he does need to learn to handle his stress better..

    Oh the first thing YOU have to do is take this as a wake up call. You should be terribly worried about what he will do next if this wasn't enough to get your attention. Sit down and listen to your son.
    LoveMyDog

    Answer by LoveMyDog at 8:37 AM on Nov. 3, 2010

  • Perhaps it is that he did this out of frustration during or right after the fight. Usually when kids cut their hair, it is just trying to do a hair cut on themselves. That is something different than a reaction to an upsetting event.
    tootoobusy

    Answer by tootoobusy at 8:28 AM on Nov. 3, 2010

  • The fact that he is dealing with his father leaving is reason to get him help now. This is not reason to say you are not terribly worried. I am glad that the school is giving attention to what could become a very serious issue.
    tootoobusy

    Answer by tootoobusy at 8:38 AM on Nov. 3, 2010

  • Kids cut their hair because they think it would be a good idea (even though it's obviously not...) - that's normal. To get angry and frustrated and have the response be to cut his hair like that really isn't all the common. Especially with what you said about his dad leaving and stuff. Yes - it is VERY normal for kids to have anger issues and stuff with that going on, but at the same time, it's also very common for kids who are having those issues to need a little help coming to terms with it.

    Don't look at it as a criticism of you or your ds - look at it as more like preventive medicine, kwim? Because if the counselor or a therapist talks to him and there isn't an issue, they'll figure that out pretty quick, but better safe than sorry, and if there is a problem, wouldn't you want to find out and nip it in the bud now, before he hurts himself? (trust me, at 8, kids can have self destructive feelings sometimes)
    sailorwifenmom

    Answer by sailorwifenmom at 8:50 AM on Nov. 3, 2010

  • I agree with LoveMyDog 100% -- you need to listen to your son, he is crying out for help. Maybe the school calling it "cutter tendencies" was going too far, but your son really needs some help right now to deal with the upheaval in your home. The school should have a counselor on staff, that would be a great place to start.
    MommaofH2

    Answer by MommaofH2 at 8:54 AM on Nov. 3, 2010

  • he cut his own hair at 8 yrs old, because he was mad? then no....thats not normal. but i dont see it as "cutter tendencies" thats crazyness
    hotmama83227

    Answer by hotmama83227 at 8:27 AM on Nov. 3, 2010

  • I agree, they are making too much of it. But your boy needs some anger management................
    older

    Answer by older at 8:28 AM on Nov. 3, 2010

  • Your son is angry and does not know how to control his emotions. Maybe he does not have the signs of being a cutter, which I don't see from this, but he does need help learning to control himself. He may hurt himself or others... what he did is overly aggressive and does need to be addressed. For HIS sake.
    HistoryMamaX3

    Answer by HistoryMamaX3 at 11:59 AM on Nov. 3, 2010

  • This is not just a regular hair cutting experiment that so many kids have done... he did it BECAUSE he was angry. He did it because he needed to DO something. It was an angry act that he knew was wrong but was unable to control because of his feelings. This is more serious than hiding in the bathroom playing barber shop. His reaction was a result of his anger- which he needs to learn to address.
    HistoryMamaX3

    Answer by HistoryMamaX3 at 12:02 PM on Nov. 3, 2010

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