Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

How would u handle this?

About 6months ago I reunited with one of my friends from high school, she moved to the same area I live in because her hubby got a job here. They have alot of financial problems & her aunt offers to help them out if they move closer to her which is an hour & half away. My friend before moving had planned on getting a job when she moved near her aunt, which she did. Her aunt got sick a month ago & couldn't watch her little girl anymore. I go to College Full-Time and I have no family other than my husband. My friend asked me to babysit for her & I did 4 or 5 times, she never told me thank you. BUT... One of the times she asked me I told her I didn't know if I could or not because I made plans with my best-friend who was 5months pregnant at the time & we had made plans to go to the movies for 2 weeks. The day I was suppose to go to the movies my friend asks me to watch her little girl & got mad when I told her I had plans.

Answer Question
 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 9:00 AM on Nov. 3, 2010 in Toddlers (1-2)

Answers (7)
  • Anyway.... She got furious and wouldn't say anything when I told her i had plans and I would let her know for sure. I feel like it was rude for her to drop it on me the way she did. But, she could have cared-less I had plans, I never go out because I'm always so busy.
    mszh2010

    Answer by mszh2010 at 9:04 AM on Nov. 3, 2010

  • If you told her ahead of time that you had plans on X day, she should have made note of it and made other arrangements for childcare at that time. She should not expect you to watch her child, (especially short notice) and then get mad when you have other plans.
    MizLee

    Answer by MizLee at 9:10 AM on Nov. 3, 2010

  • Her problem sorry to say.. Its unfortunate but she needs to make other arrangments.. YOUR A FULL TIME STUDENT!.. its ok to watch on the odd ocassion but you need to focus on your study and your life.. I know it sounds selfish but being a full time mother and studying full time and working also I know how hard study and time management and a life can be.. Tell her if you want you dont mind watching the kid ( if you dont mind it ) but tell her you have a life too and she needs to work around your life.. you are not her mother!
    Weldo1983

    Answer by Weldo1983 at 9:13 AM on Nov. 3, 2010

  • You know she told me over the phone, she talked to her aunt and told her either she started helping her with watching her little girl or her aunt was going to have to help her pay for daycare. Her aunt has paid for EVERYTHING! I believe her aunt is feeling like I am, like she is being used. I believe thats why her aunt doesn't want to babysit anymore!!!
    Her aunt paid for them to move, their 1st month rent, $300 in groceries, gave them a new couch, table, cabinet, bought her 2 cars (which 1 broke down) bought her little girl a toddler bed, gave them a new bed for their room, bought her little girls birthday cake, pays for her cell phone. And, she treats her aunt terrible.....
    mszh2010

    Answer by mszh2010 at 9:23 AM on Nov. 3, 2010

  • Go to the movies. Your life does not revolve around her schedule and she needs to be the responsible one and figure out something else if other people are busy. She's taking advantage of you, because she expects you to drop everything for her. Which isn't fair to you. Don't allow her to abuse your friendship and your willingness to babysit. She can find someone else. Just keep your plans.
    JazzlikeMraz

    Answer by JazzlikeMraz at 10:10 AM on Nov. 3, 2010

  • Sounds like your friend needs to grow up, big time. Its HER responisbilty to take care of her little girl, not yours and not her aunts. And getting mad at you for not being able to watch her kid? PATHETIC. If she has a job, its her responsibilty to find someone to babysit. If you cant, she should have just moved onto the next person on her list. You are allowed to have a life. You dont need to explain yourself to her. All you needed to say was "I cant. I have plans" and she should have said "Ok thanks anyways".
    It sounds like she is just a user. i will admit, my mom helps out a lot with our baby. But we always say thank you, always offer to help her with whatever we can, and we dont expect her to be available to watch our daughter at a moments notice. We appreciate everything she does, and we let her know that all the time.
    Its sad about her aunt, but as long as she lets her take advantage, she will continue to do it.
    Mme.Langley

    Answer by Mme.Langley at 1:57 PM on Nov. 3, 2010

  • Oh, yeah I know... I just don't need negative people in my life right now, I have ALOT going on with College and staying at home. And this is just making it worse.
    mszh2010

    Answer by mszh2010 at 2:07 PM on Nov. 3, 2010

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.