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Is it "abnormal" to be a stay-at-home mom or something? I am literally the 1 and only sahm in my area and people are not nice about it. My dh's family, friends, and co-workers bother him constantly about how "lazy" I am. We made the decision TOGETHER for me to stay home with out dd, it's actually helping us financially because of daycare costs. Dh has people coming up to him randomly and asking if I'm working yet, if I have dinner waiting for him when he gets home (at 2 in the afternoon btw), and if I ever take breaks from cleaning etc. They tell him to "keep me in check" and that I need to get a job because I'm just lazy and using him. WTF is up with this attitude people have and why is being a sahm such a "terrible" thing that they need to butt into our lives?!? Does anyone else get this treatment?

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Asked by -xoxo- at 11:26 AM on Nov. 3, 2010 in General Parenting

Level 9 (226 Credits)
Answers (21)
  • All the mothers I know are SAHMs. I am the only working mother I know!

    Answer by mompam at 11:27 AM on Nov. 3, 2010

  • FFS .. tell them to go F$%^ themselves.. being a SAHM is not a easy ride.. you and every one on here knows that.. if hubby doesnt mind and it helps with the bills then stay a SAHM.. I would rather be a SAHM and do the cleaning cooking and actually spend time with my baby but I am studying full time so I have to put her in day care twice a week.. and now shes full time whilst im working. its not cheap day care. bloody hell if I wasnt studying and had a decent income from hubby I would be laughing.. Enjoy the time being a SAHM and dont let anyone bother you or make you feel bad.. no point working your guts out when you can't spend time with your kids. :) goodluck

    Answer by Weldo1983 at 11:29 AM on Nov. 3, 2010

  • Maybe it's just because I'm in a tiny little town?


    Comment by -xoxo- (original poster) at 11:29 AM on Nov. 3, 2010

  • We had those things come up when I was a young single mom and lived with my mom and we decided for me to stay home with him until he started school. I got tired of folks asking when I was going to work. I was always like, I DO work, I am raising my son.

    Answer by BradenIsMySon at 11:31 AM on Nov. 3, 2010

  • i'm in a tiny town too, and i feel like my fil looks down on me b/c i'm a workd for us so whatever lol and last night ,my dh was finally like "i don't see how you do it all day" being a sahm isn't for anyone who is lazy, i used to have a full time job working 40 plus hours a week and it was much easier than being home with the kids

    Answer by josiesmommy00 at 11:32 AM on Nov. 3, 2010

  • Maybe explain to them that you don't want to work just to pay for daycare. That you also like watching your kids grow up. That is you and your husbands choice, not everyone else's.

    Answer by arenad at 11:34 AM on Nov. 3, 2010

  • I never heard negative remarks when I was a SAHM.  When I went back to work is when I got the nasty catty remarks from some women I knew.   


    Answer by tabekat at 11:34 AM on Nov. 3, 2010

  • I'm from a tiny little town, too, and I'd say we are about half and half (half work, half stay home). I think that people are just ignorant, and probably SUPER jealous that you do get to stay home with your little ones! :-)

    Answer by FatGirl239 at 11:36 AM on Nov. 3, 2010

  • Dh has explained to each and every one of them (even though he really shouldn't have to) why we chose for me to be a SAHM and no one seems to get it. One guy asked what I do all day and when my dh answered, "She takes care of our kid", he rolled his eyes and said that he'd kill himself from boredom. Mostly people just talk about the financial aspect of it and how I'm not contributing.


    Comment by -xoxo- (original poster) at 11:37 AM on Nov. 3, 2010

  • I would inform them all that they are not part of my marriage and if they intend on keeping their nose attached to their face they need to remove their nose from our business. I would also inform them that "I" would be keeping them in check to be sure they stayed out of my marriage.  Your husband needs to start asserting himself and advise them to butt out also.


    Answer by emerald53197 at 11:43 AM on Nov. 3, 2010

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