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I need some advice about my stepson lying about homework

My stepson is 9 yrs old. He's doing very well in school-he has all A's and B's. But we can't get him to stop lying about getting his homework done. We even check his book bag every night to make sure he did it but sometimes he still lies and says he got it done. Sometimes he even leaves it at school so we don't know he didn't get it done. I don't know what to do to get him to stop lying about it. I don't understand why he keeps lying to us! Help!

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Asked by bcbmami at 5:19 PM on Nov. 3, 2010 in Tweens (9-12)

Level 12 (817 Credits)
Answers (6)
  • If you are checking his work every night, and he is leaving it at school and/or lying about it, I'm assuming the teacher knows that he is not getting it done. I would reach out to the teacher, and see what sort of communication you can have regarding his homework. In our district, I can look on line and see what assignments are due for my kids. You could also go the "natural consequence" route - if you get a note from the teacher saying he hasn't turned in an assignment, he gets privileges taken away.

    Answer by Scuba at 5:34 PM on Nov. 3, 2010

  • I'd say now is a good time to start teaching him a thing or two about lying AND responsibility. If he cannot be honest about whether or not he is doing his homework, then make him do it right there at the kitchen table where you and your husband can monitor it being done. It may be a little time consuming for you and I am sure he will hate having to do that, but maybe it will motivate him to start doing it on his own and being honest about doing it.

    Answer by Ctink8189 at 5:49 PM on Nov. 3, 2010

  • We had my son write the assignment in his notebook OR the words "no homework". Then he had the teacher sign the notebook everyday. It took two seconds as he left the classroom. Then we looked at the notebook each night and looked at the homework. He hated doing this at first but got used to it and actually enjoyed the one on one time with us if we had to watch him do it. GL

    Answer by elizabr at 7:32 PM on Nov. 3, 2010

  • Had the same issue. My son's teacher signs his homework assignment pad every day to insure it is all written correctly and I need to sign every day that is is done. If it is not or a book is missing I write a note why and my son stays in on recess and completes the missing work. If my son forgets his homework assignment pad I can be proactive and check the teachers website for the homework assignments. Needless to say this is up to how cooperative the teacher is. My son is in 3rd grade. I can assure you the higher grades are not as cooperative as my 7th grader forgets to bring stuff home all the time and middle school is a hole different ball game!

    Answer by DeeMomOfFour at 12:09 AM on Nov. 4, 2010

  • Just want to clarify that my son getting his notebook signed was all through high school. I met with the teachers and we worked together to make sure my son was succesful with this.

    Answer by elizabr at 7:55 AM on Nov. 4, 2010

  • Thanks ladies for the advise! It's very appreciated!

    Comment by bcbmami (original poster) at 9:35 AM on Nov. 4, 2010

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