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OK, I need to be a little clearer. I have temp custody of my grandchildren and the older has violent tantrums. I am under court orders for NO CORPORAL PUNISHMENT. this child has behavior problems to say the least which only just recently started. Now what is the best way to stop a tantrum?

Answer Question
 
SAfogus

Asked by SAfogus at 9:26 PM on Nov. 3, 2010 in School-Age Kids (5-8)

Level 4 (52 Credits)
Answers (19)
  • hold him
    butterflyblue19

    Answer by butterflyblue19 at 9:28 PM on Nov. 3, 2010

  • completelt ignore a temper tantrum
    mommom2000

    Answer by mommom2000 at 9:28 PM on Nov. 3, 2010

  • time out in bedroom, take things away one at a time until he calms down
    AprylnAtticus

    Answer by AprylnAtticus at 9:28 PM on Nov. 3, 2010

  • put him in time out and ignore the tantrum.
    princessbeth79

    Answer by princessbeth79 at 9:29 PM on Nov. 3, 2010

  • How old are they...5 or 8? I would send them to their room until they calm down. As hard as it is, you also have to ignore the tantrum. Any attention is just that attention, be it yelling, talking, anything. Negative or positive attention just reinforces their behavior. Then when they are calm you discuss it, but shortly. I would assume they are having some kind of tramatic issues, being with you temporarily. And if they have "seen" some not so pleasant behavior in their home situation with parent(s) their behavior is normal. You may want to see what kind of help you can get. Maybe go to your public library and ask for info on on support groups. My library has Grandparents Raising Grandchildren. They also have a playground headed by "(towns name) County Promise", which is basically a free service for families to get help/info/support on raising children. There are so many services out there, you just have to begin looking.
    2BlondeBabies

    Answer by 2BlondeBabies at 9:31 PM on Nov. 3, 2010

  • she refuses to go into time out even when physical placed there. and its a little hard to ignore someone who is hitting, kicking, scratching and biting you.
    SAfogus

    Comment by SAfogus (original poster) at 9:34 PM on Nov. 3, 2010

  • Ignore it, time out.
    TARARENEE

    Answer by TARARENEE at 9:34 PM on Nov. 3, 2010

  • I would suggest ignoring it. Let him have his tantrum. Then when he calms down go back and talk to him. The only way you should intervene is if he attacks someone else. Then you need to control him by either holding him or putting him in his room.
    JazzlikeMraz

    Answer by JazzlikeMraz at 9:36 PM on Nov. 3, 2010

  • ignore a temper tantrum. bad attention is still attention. you said you have custody that tells me the child is going through a rough time and has the right to be upset. they just don't know how to handle the stress. when the tantrum is over see if the two of you can't talk things out and let them know it is ok to be mad and you still love them. always end it with a big hug and kiss.

    northcarolinama

    Answer by northcarolinama at 9:36 PM on Nov. 3, 2010

  • Don't give him attention when he's flipping out. Tell him that you will be in the other room when he is ready, and walk away. DO make a HUGE deal when he is doing things the way he should. Postive re enforcements.
    Musicmom80

    Answer by Musicmom80 at 9:39 PM on Nov. 3, 2010

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