Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

1 Bump

I'm going in for a planned csection on the 12th. Why am I so scared? I had a cesection 2 years ago.

It was not planned at all and I was fine. But, for some reason I am just horrified. All I do is think bad thoughts about everything that could go wrong and I can't get them out of my head. Iam scared to death and I don't know why. I had a really bad dream about it last night. I tried talking to my husband about it and he does not understand. But, how could he right? Anyway.. If i think about it it makes me cry. I am dreading doing this. Not having the baby but having the cesection. Anyone else feel this way or have any words of encouragement?

Answer Question

Asked by smarie1011 at 12:21 AM on Nov. 4, 2010 in Pregnancy

Level 10 (440 Credits)
Answers (20)
  • Was your first a planned c-section or emergency? I had an emergency for the 1st one and the 2nd one was scheduled. I can't say I was necessarily scared, but I was a bit nervous about certain aspects of it. Just relax a bit, mama. You are going to be holding your new lil one before you know it!! Maybe you are just keyed up because you KNOW what is going to happen (basically). The more you try to relax, the easier it will seem. Just keep in your mind that your lil one is coming. You are gonna be a mom again! You are going to be seeing that sweet lil angel face very soon!! Good luck tomorrow!!! I pray you have a wonderful outcome. Do you know - boy or girl? If not, then you have THAT to look forward to also. Just think of seeing your baby's face, hearing him/her cry for the first time, seeing them all snuggled in the hospital blanket like a little bug. They always remind me of those little glow worms! lol ENJOY THIS TIME!!!!!!

    Answer by mama2000_1 at 12:28 AM on Nov. 4, 2010

  • oh sorry - was thinking it was tomorrow! Good luck on the 12th :)

    Answer by mama2000_1 at 12:28 AM on Nov. 4, 2010

  • Because c-sections are unnatural. That's why.

    Answer by ourbabykins at 12:34 AM on Nov. 4, 2010

  • If you don't want to, go for a vBAC! Two years is a safe spacing for a VBAC. If you are otherwise healthy, then go for it. If you are up all night upset about the C, don't do it.

    Answer by ecodani at 12:35 AM on Nov. 4, 2010

  • Hugs to you, mamma. You are scared because a C-section is major surgery and it's scary as hell! When it's an emergency you are focused on getting the baby out... the situation is what is scary and you're too full of concern for your health and the baby's to be scared of being cut open. Now you have the time to think about all the scary surgical stuff!

    Something to think about... VBAC is almost always safer for mom and baby, and ACOG has said that most women should attempt it. Since you are so scared of another C-section, and VBAC is safer, why not explore that option? I know it feels like it's too late to change the game plan, but it is never too late to make a decision that will protect you, your baby, and help you sleep at night. You can do it if you want to.

    PM me if you want to talk or have questions about how to go about having a VBAC :) Luck and light!

    Answer by Ati_13 at 12:41 AM on Nov. 4, 2010

  • The first c-section was because I had highblood pressure. I delieverd at 37 weeks. This time around I have been perfectly fine no major problems. I guess. We live 700 miles away from family and if I went in to labor right now I would honestly have NO ONE to watch my 8 year old stepson and my 2 year old. I think thats the ONLY reason we ever even brought it up. And if you don't have kids then there is no way you could understand that. The one person who could help has been stressing me out my entire pregnancy and thats a whole nother story. Planning it means my mom will be able to be here to help us out. I really don't want to do this. But, I don't feel like I have a choice...

    Comment by smarie1011 (original poster) at 12:47 AM on Nov. 4, 2010

  • Have you considered a VBAC? They are safer for both mother and child, benefit you in many ways, and reduce your risks of pregnancy complications and a plethora of other issues later down the road.

    You can contact ICAN, join the VBAC group here on CM (, or if you want to ask me about it and my VBAC I am more than happy to provide you with information. :)

    You have choices. You have options. You can change your mind. ((hugs))

    Answer by NDFanatik at 12:49 AM on Nov. 4, 2010

  • I understand being alone and not having someone to watch your child. We didn't have anyone to watch my 2 year old when I had my son. So she was there with us. I know some moms don't like having their child with them in labor, but hiring a doula (or finding one to work for free) would solve that problem. You would have labor support AND someone to watch the kiddo if you needed to bring him with you.

    Answer by Ati_13 at 12:53 AM on Nov. 4, 2010

  • I was you two months ago! My first was emergency and I didn't care because after 18 hours of labor I really didn't care if they used their bare hands to get him out. When my 2nd planned c-section was approaching I was terrified and even asked the same question on here. But when the night before the surgery came I actually slept and got to the hospital. I think I was so scared I was numb. Then when I walked into the operating room, I started panicking. They gave me some meds and then I felt calmer. The c-section went amazing! I was up and moving that night and off pain meds in 3 days.

    The doctors know what they are doing. Just concentrate on the outcome, not the surgery.

    Answer by sunshine58103 at 12:55 AM on Nov. 4, 2010

  • I didn't think you were allowed to have your child with you when you were in labor? What would I do if the outcome ended up being a c-section anyway.. I would have to go in without my husband? What is a doula? Just wondering..

    Comment by smarie1011 (original poster) at 12:56 AM on Nov. 4, 2010

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.