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3 Bumps

People are so small minded sometimes...

My friend is in her 20s and doesn't want kids. She loves them, just feels she personally does not have the right temperament to deal with em. She gets along with other people's kids great, just doesn't feel she can handle raising them, disciplining and being responsible 24/7 and giving up the life she wants to have for herself to raise kids.

I think thats very mature, yet other people call her names and a child hater, etc so on. They don't bother to ask her why, they just assume she dislikes kids. Why are people like that? Lets just jump to conclusions and hate them without finding out if there's a good reason?


Asked by Zoeyis at 5:58 AM on Nov. 4, 2010 in General Parenting

Level 31 (46,808 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (13)
  • I don't get people sometimes. My sister in law is just like your friend. She adores my daughter, and spoils her rotten, and I'm sure that she'll do the same with any other children we have, but she admits that having a child of her own is something she just couldn't do. She's very career oriented, and also enjoys her lifestyle child free. We both just sit back and laugh at those people who jump to the conclusion that she must hate kids because she doesn't want them.

    Answer by Eviesmommy at 9:02 AM on Nov. 4, 2010

  • Because they never probably asked her why. They just know she does not want any kids of her own. I wish there where a lot more young people like her.
    I found out after 2 kids. I was not into raising kids. I stoped at 2.

    Answer by louise2 at 6:04 AM on Nov. 4, 2010

  • I am 34 my only child so fare is only 21 months.LOL.I wasn't ready to have kids when I was younger.That's why I waited.I am so glad I did.I all ways loved kids.I just seen what a lot of them went though when there parents put them self before there kids.I wanted to make sure I was ready, and with the right man.So tell her who cares what people say.She is doing what is right for her.Some people are so stupid.They are just mad because they got tied down when they didn't want to.Don't get me wrong I know a lot of people in there early 2o's that are good parents.You know if your not ready,I did.

    Answer by bucky77 at 6:12 AM on Nov. 4, 2010

  • I wouldn't pay attention to that... in life we find people that like to LABELED certain situations...maybe your friend change her mind later on and decide to have kids....what they are going to say then??.. Hummm what did she waited this long to have kids?... We can  never pleased everyone... Just follow your heart... I had my fiest baby at 30...Never listened what people had to say...........



    Answer by Monica655 at 6:46 AM on Nov. 4, 2010

  • DH & i get crap all the time because we don't want any more kids. He has none of his own, but is happy with a step child. Everyone says that i should be giving him his own child,'s not just me who is not really interested in any more. We get so much pressure to have kids, it's very annoying. AND. people get real weirded out when we tell them, NO...that we're not having any more kids. What is with people wanting OTHERS to want kids?

    Answer by samurai_chica at 7:13 AM on Nov. 4, 2010

  • who cares? just laugh with her and be supportive if she needs a shoulder to lean on!

    Answer by smokisses at 7:40 AM on Nov. 4, 2010

  • You are right. People can be very small-minded and judgemental. It seems to threaten people when anyone is different or makes diifferent decisions.....Your friend is fine, and sounds like she is independent and knows what she wants....

    Answer by Anna92464 at 7:42 AM on Nov. 4, 2010

  • I totally agree with you and kudos to your friend! Alot of women do not think for themselves and have all these children that they can't handle, and KNEW they couldn't handle them before they even came! It's quite sad. My mother's very best friend since childhood is now 50 years old. She has no children, but has been a 1st grade teacher for years and LOVES what she does. It isn't that she doesn't like children, it's just that she knew that having children of her own wasn't for her.

    Answer by Ctink8189 at 7:52 AM on Nov. 4, 2010

  • Just like you said, people are small minded. I wouldn't let it bother you. You & your friend both know the reason and that should be the only thing that matters. PFFT to the others who are so immature and inconsiderate.

    Answer by TeensMom07 at 7:56 AM on Nov. 4, 2010

  • I know a few people like that, and I say, as long as they figure that out before they have kids, more power to 'em! It's sad some people are judgmental. That's their issue, not hers, but I imagine it's hurtful to her.

    Answer by musicpisces at 8:08 AM on Nov. 4, 2010