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What's the best way to break up a fight when kids are fighting over the same toy?


Asked by girliemom0406 at 1:02 PM on Nov. 4, 2010 in Preschoolers (3-4)

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Answers (10)
  • When my kiddos start fighting over a toy I take it away from both of them and put up. I tell them if they cannot share and play nicely with each other then neither one of them should have it.

    Answer by Ctink8189 at 1:03 PM on Nov. 4, 2010

  • Have the toy take a time out. I had a friend who did this and one day all of the toys were in timeout and nobody was able to play with anything. I works even with my 28 mo and her friend who isn't quite 2 yet.

    Answer by coala at 1:03 PM on Nov. 4, 2010

  • Tell them to stop and give mommy the toy....when they calm down tell them if they cant play nice with it then they dont get that one back.....or you could do 15-30 min each so they share.

    Answer by Shelii at 1:03 PM on Nov. 4, 2010

  • Yep, if they can't share or take turns, the toy goes in time out, where they can see it!

    Answer by matobe at 1:07 PM on Nov. 4, 2010

  • I take the toy away for a set amount of time (depends on the age at the time). Then when that time is up I flip a coin and the child that "wins' gets the toys first. Then every 10 mins they switch. Usually after they both get it this way once the fight is over and their bored with taht toy :)

    Answer by LorisChar at 1:11 PM on Nov. 4, 2010

  • seperate and take the toy away

    Answer by SabrenaLeigh at 1:12 PM on Nov. 4, 2010

  • I only put the toy in "time out" if I do not know who had the toy first. If I know who had it first I give it to that child and make the other child wait. I really explain that that sharing does not mean that your friend has to give the toy they are playing with to you right away, they will give it to you when they are done playing with it. If they both went after the toy at the same time, then usually the toy does end up in time out unless we can agree on something (you have it for 5 minutes and then you can have it for 5 minutes)

    Answer by JamieLK at 1:13 PM on Nov. 4, 2010

  • A lot depends on the age of the child. If they are young and not very verbal, you could set a timer for a minute or two and take turns. If they are older and verbal, this is a great time to teach them the skill of working out a problem. You could say, "I see you both want to use that toy." Kids will usually say something at this point! You could ask them what they think would work. They often come up with a solution of who could use it first. If they don't, you coulld ask if they could think of a way that they can use it together. Sometimes kids just need a little help in the problem solving area. It's all new to them so you want to use the opportunity to teach and also have them use the skills. If they can't resolve it (which happens sometimes), and you don't know who had it first, you can say that you going to put the toy in a shelf and bring it out later. But always give them the opportunity to solve it first!

    Answer by AlisonAstair at 1:15 PM on Nov. 4, 2010

  • i will just take away the toy if they are not sharing.
    this on playdates with my daughter and my friend son
    if they don share at all no playing the toy more likely i take away

    Answer by mommytobe24 at 9:06 PM on Nov. 4, 2010

  • take the toy away & they have to find something else to play with.

    Answer by momoflilangel at 5:00 PM on Nov. 19, 2010