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3 Bumps

Where are the parents with 3 or more kids?

My kids are all at the age where they can help.

How do I get my stuff together, I feel like every day is a battle.

When I am trying to control/fixing one situation, another comes up right in the middle, then I forget about what I was doing. OMG< it is like a war in my home, and I am the enemy. :( How do you handle it? How do you get everything together, by the way I work from 9am-3pm. Yes I am single, by choice, I left him 3 months ago. I will never be in a relationship again that I am not happy with, or feel controled. When my kids found out we were separating, not a tear was shed, i think they were relieved we argued too much.

Lately, it has been hard, and although I know this too will pass, sometimes I get discouraged......

Answer Question
 
KFree907

Asked by KFree907 at 1:36 PM on Nov. 4, 2010 in General Parenting

Level 20 (8,947 Credits)
Answers (4)
  • Teach them you are all a team and you have to work together. Have a routine for each of them. Give them responsibilities and have consequences if they don't follow through. Make sure to take time for yourself so that you are refreshed and ready to deal with them peacefully.
    lish2127

    Answer by lish2127 at 1:43 PM on Nov. 4, 2010

  • I have three kids... now that they are a bit older (8, 6, and almost 4) it has gotten easier to be organized. I know at times when they were 4, 2, and infant there were days where it took me forever and gave me ten new grey hairs just to get out the door! One of the most useful things I did was to make them resolve situations on their own- for a while I felt like I was the ref in a boxing match because someone was always running up to tell me 'Sibling X did this to me... and then sibling y did that....' - it drove me nuts. I instituted a rule of 'if you can't play together, play separately until you're ready to resolve your diferences.' They would have to go to separate rooms until they were ready to make up and get along. They do much better getting along now and when they don't, at least I don't have to referree their disputes! Hang in there... it will get better!
    Freela

    Answer by Freela at 2:00 PM on Nov. 4, 2010

  • I have 5 kids but I'm a SAHM and married so not sure I could relate.  I have been on my own, though.  Back in April my husband transferred jobs and moved away.  I was left alone (mostly, we were living with my dad but he gave me minimal help) with 4 kids and I was in my 3rd trimester.  And I had no car.  It was beyond rough and I was so exhausted I just gave up and the kids ran all over me.  It took my husband a couple weeks to get control when he came back for the baby's birth and I'm still working on keeping control over the situation.  The girls are giving me the most trouble.  My 10yo has behavior problems and his getting hormonal on top of that.  She shares a room with the 8yo and 4yo and the 3 of them fight like crazy.  The only helpful one is the 8yo.  The others fight me every turn.

    justanotherjen

    Answer by justanotherjen at 2:05 PM on Nov. 4, 2010

  • I have 5 kids. Three are from my ex husband and after I left him they weren't at an age where they could help - so it was hard. If your kids are old enough to help, then have them help! My 9 and 10 year old are invaluable as helpers. Make sure you get things set the night before so in the mornings all you have to do is wake up, get dressed, eat and go. My older kids do chores, watch the little ones, and are learning to help cook.
    missanc

    Answer by missanc at 2:39 PM on Nov. 4, 2010

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