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How can I deal with an over attentive first time grand mother better then I have been?

My boyfriend's mother is over attentive. When we visit her, she is constantly holding my son. she won't even put him down to eat supper at the kitchen table. She will sit at the table holding him in on arm and eating as fast as she can with her free hand. i can't even breast feed him at her house, I have to pump it because she insists on feeding him, and changing him. I can't get anywhere near him. tummy time is non-existant at her house. my boyfriend and i are firm believers in laying him down while he is sleeping. what do i do?

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babymomma101110

Asked by babymomma101110 at 4:27 PM on Nov. 4, 2010 in Babies (0-12 months)

Level 7 (163 Credits)
Answers (15)
  • Do not pump insist on breat feeding. Other than that let her hold him. She is in love. It is wonderful.
    tootoobusy

    Answer by tootoobusy at 4:29 PM on Nov. 4, 2010

  • Say nothing. She is doing her grandmother job. You don't live there 24/7 and she isn't hurting him. He is a baby...just relax and let it go. It will be less stressful for you and at least he isn't being abused or neglected.
    BradenIsMySon

    Answer by BradenIsMySon at 4:30 PM on Nov. 4, 2010

  • Well her holding him is ok, but do NOT pump again for her. It is YOUR right to feed the baby. Just take the baby and say it is time for my to nurse. And if she says did you pump, say no i did not. the end. hugs!!
    txdaniella

    Answer by txdaniella at 4:30 PM on Nov. 4, 2010

  • I agree with the others about the feeding though. LOL
    BradenIsMySon

    Answer by BradenIsMySon at 4:31 PM on Nov. 4, 2010

  • I'd let her lavish the attention on the child when she is around and continue with the usual parenting when she is absent.
    tasches

    Answer by tasches at 4:31 PM on Nov. 4, 2010

  • I have to agree with tootoobusy, sorry!

    FatGirl239

    Answer by FatGirl239 at 4:33 PM on Nov. 4, 2010

  • If your visits are just occasionally then i don't think it's a big deal. Though when it comes to breastfeeding I would let her know that you need to feed. Don't bring your pump or a bottle so as to eliminate this option.
    worriedmommy600

    Answer by worriedmommy600 at 4:35 PM on Nov. 4, 2010

  • I would just let her do her thing, unless she is his daycare provider on a regular basis, what is a few hours going to hurt? Now is she is his full time babysitter, you do need to address a few things,,,,but remember more flies with honey than with vinegar! Relax and have a glass of wine after you pump, LOL!
    kimigogo

    Answer by kimigogo at 4:36 PM on Nov. 4, 2010

  • It is a grandparent's right to spoil a grandbaby, particularly if it's the first. However, I agree with all these other ladies in that you should still breastfeed your child whether she likes it or not. Since Grandma is so involved in baby, why not take the time to rest & relax with a little nap?
    hootie826

    Answer by hootie826 at 4:36 PM on Nov. 4, 2010

  • don't pump just because she wants to... I literally would take my girls out of SOs mom's hands because she also does this... I tell her "we aren't raising them to be coddled" and SO fully backs me on this
    twinmama2009

    Answer by twinmama2009 at 4:39 PM on Nov. 4, 2010

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