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10 Bumps

How is having your own personal email account keeping "secrets"?

Why is it considered OK for you to have access to your SO's PERSONAL accounts, or for them to have access to yours? What ever happened to mutual regard, trust, respect, privacy?

And how in the heck is it keeping a secret if you do not share your account info?

Answer Question
 
ObbyDobbie

Asked by ObbyDobbie at 7:50 PM on Nov. 5, 2010 in Relationships

Level 34 (70,074 Credits)
Answers (24)
  • it's not keeping secrets unless you're using it for the purpose of keeping secrets. I agree that it's mutual trust and respect that two adults in a relationship do not have to share every single speck of their lives. After 27 years of marriage and 30 years of being together, I'm still my own person and have the right to my own privacy.
    ceallaigh

    Answer by ceallaigh at 7:52 PM on Nov. 5, 2010

  • No idea.  I've never looked at my husband's e-mail.  I don't snoop around his phone or look at his texts.  It's none of my business.  And he's never tried to look at my e-mails or asked to see my texts, etc.  He doesn't care.

    justanotherjen

    Answer by justanotherjen at 7:53 PM on Nov. 5, 2010

  • I don't think it is wrong to not have access. The only accounts I have he has access to. I just know that he has accounts that I don't have access to. I don't care. I don't think he is keeping secrets though.
    dancinintherain

    Answer by dancinintherain at 7:54 PM on Nov. 5, 2010

  • People who just have to have their SO's personal info are insecure and nosy if they're snooping on it. I think people forget their SO was their own person before they met.
    sunshineemommy

    Answer by sunshineemommy at 7:55 PM on Nov. 5, 2010

  • I have never asked for DH's email passwords and such and he has never asked for mine. We know each others email addresses but never access them.
    ashisamom

    Answer by ashisamom at 7:55 PM on Nov. 5, 2010

  • Those of us who have been cheated on in the past have a hard time trusting. If we never looked we may never have known. So what's better in that instance? What you don't know doesn't kill you or finding out that your SO is wasting years of your life? In today's world, I don't "trust" anyone or put anything past anyone.
    momofone221

    Answer by momofone221 at 7:59 PM on Nov. 5, 2010

  • Those of us who have been cheated on in the past have a hard time trusting. If we never looked we may never have known. So what's better in that instance? What you don't know doesn't kill you or finding out that your SO is wasting years of your life? In today's world, I don't "trust" anyone or put anything past anyone.
    --------------------------------------

    Been there, done that, bought the T-shirt. Was cheated on more than I can count, but that does not give me the right to violate the trust that my partner and I have grown and nurtured. If you can't have trust in a relationship, then you can't have anything worthwhile.
    ObbyDobbie

    Comment by ObbyDobbie (original poster) at 8:02 PM on Nov. 5, 2010

  • LOL, my husband keeps giving me his stuff...but I keep forgetting it because I never go look at it. He has mine and never looks. I don't care if he did..he just doesn't feel the need.
    GrnEyedGrandma

    Answer by GrnEyedGrandma at 8:03 PM on Nov. 5, 2010

  • Everyone's relationship is different and it's really none of your business how other people's relationships work. I had all of my husband's passwords and he had mine. What if one of us was not home and needed some info from an email,, or one of us died? there are other reasons for having this info other than snooping.
    mhaney03

    Answer by mhaney03 at 8:12 PM on Nov. 5, 2010

  • If I die, my email account will go dormant, and be deactivated, eventually it will be deleted. In today's technology age, there is rarely (never) a reason for another individual to access a personal account- they can be accessed from literally anywhere.

    ObbyDobbie

    Comment by ObbyDobbie (original poster) at 8:16 PM on Nov. 5, 2010

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