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Temper Temper!!

DD is normally a very good baby. But omg does she have a temper! Even when she was a little bitty baby. If I was changing her diaper and she got mad or something she would stiffen up and turn purple. Then as she got a little bit older she started throwing stuff. If she got ahold of my phone and I took it from her, she'd pick up a rattle and chuck it. Now she's 10 1/2 months old and mobile. She has started slapping *when she does this I put her hand down and t ell her no and put her down*. If she crawls over to the trash can and I tell her no she SCREAMS. If she gets ahold of something and I take it from her she throws a fit. The other night she was trying to get my dad's glass off the table, and he took it from her and said "no" so she sat down started fussing and was pinching herself! How can I help her not have such a grumpy temper? When I tell her no I just calmly say "no" and re-direct her. I don't yell or hit her...

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Asked by Anonymous at 12:38 AM on Nov. 6, 2010 in Babies (0-12 months)

Answers (7)
  • my son is the same way. hes 17 months old but hes been this way for a while. he hits me, screams, throws things, throws temper tantrums, throws himself on the floor. lots of stuff. i wondered if it was because me and my SO both have a temper and stuff like that but at his last DR's appointment, without me even saying anything, my DR asked me if hes been throwing temper tantrums and such and i said yes and i told him what he does, and he said good thats fine and its normal, thats there way of expressing there emotions and the best thing to do for now is ignore it.

    Answer by PURPULbutterfly at 12:41 AM on Nov. 6, 2010

  • That's just her personality, so you'll have to find ways to work with it. You can help her channel it in some way, and be very firm with her on boundaries, because she's going to need them. Definitely start now, and be consistent. Time outs are great (DS was about her age when we started them). They can do whatever (tantrum or whatever) in time out, but they have to stay there in the time out spot. Then when time out is over, remind her why she was in time out, explain what she can do next time to avoid time out,make her apologize (baby signs are great for this), remind her you love her, hug, and then move on. Help redirect toward something fun where she might not get herself worked up and into trouble. Hopefully as she gets older, she can put that energy into a sport or something else productive. =)

    Answer by musicpisces at 12:44 AM on Nov. 6, 2010

  • I also agree with purpulbutterfly, ignoring can be a very effective (albeit difficult in the heat of the moment) tool.

    Answer by musicpisces at 12:45 AM on Nov. 6, 2010

  • Obviously she has strong feelings and ideas to express. Have you considered using signs with her?

    "No" is really hard. A child who hears it enough will just get frustrated and confused. There is a huge list of stuff not to do but then what is left that they can do? If she is going for something she cant have, replace the object with something she can have. Prevention is key.

    Answer by ecodani at 12:53 AM on Nov. 6, 2010

  • You're doing great by ignoring, staying calm, re-directing. Both of my children are like that. With my DD, who is 16 mo old, I can usually redirect her by tickling her under the chin if she's just a little worked up.
    If it's a full-blown meltdown, though, oh boy, better watch out.

    Answer by MommaofH2 at 12:54 AM on Nov. 6, 2010

  • Children act out for three reasons. They have a physical need, they need more information, or are stressed. A physical need could be affection, they are hungry, thirsty, etc. More information is they don't understand what they are doing is wrong. And stressed due to overload of emotions. Just being told no obviously isn't working. Children are naturally curious and do things without knowing the consequences of their actions. Let's forget about the diaper changing epidsodes and concentrate on the present. Next time DD is about to get into something, don't react, pause and respond. The difference would be something like this: "DD I know you would like to hold daddy's glass, it is a bit heavy and can break. Why not come with mommy and I'll get you a plastic cup you can play with so you don't get hurt." DD may also have been thirsty. "DD would you like a drink? Let's get you a special cup." Try it. It works!

    Answer by DeeMomOfFour at 12:59 AM on Nov. 6, 2010

  • I know where your coming from! My two year old is just coming out of that stage and I really do think its a stage..But you must get her out of it now cause its only gonna get worse! When she goes to hit you grab her hand and hold it tightly looki her in the face and say "NO HITTING!" Say it mean...Do this everytime she goes crazy lol...I promise as long as you keep doing it you will see her stop slowly..Good luck:)

    Answer by mommyoffive1983 at 8:57 PM on Nov. 6, 2010

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