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2 Bumps

My husband cheated with his sons mom! After being told this I turn to another man and then all of a sudden my hubby loves me again and wants to work it out! What should I do? This women he cheated with will be in my life forever! Not happy right now dont know what to do??

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mommyoffive1983

Asked by mommyoffive1983 at 1:16 PM on Nov. 6, 2010 in Relationships

Level 5 (59 Credits)
Answers (17)
  • The foundation has been laid for a very effed up relationship, there is no turning back on this one, at least not without a LOT of counseling.

    shanlaree

    Answer by shanlaree at 1:19 PM on Nov. 6, 2010

  • Do you love your husband? Do you want to work it out? Regardless of whether or not this other woman will be in your life forever you need to decide if you want to continue the marriage. As for whether or not you tell your husband about what you did, that's up to you.
    rhianna1708

    Answer by rhianna1708 at 1:21 PM on Nov. 6, 2010

  • I think the wise thing to do would be to separate yourself from both of them until such time as you have clear direction as to what it is that you really want out of life. I would also want to make absolutely sure my husband knew that I was the one with whom he wanted to be. He could just be playing mind games with you, and time will reveal that. No sex with him until you know for sure!
    NannyB.

    Answer by NannyB. at 1:22 PM on Nov. 6, 2010

  • I thnk if he is wiling so save your marriage, you should try. You both cheated...so go seek a good councelor and then wipe the slate clean. Also, because you will have to have his ex in your llife b/c of his son, there need to be strict boundaries (that both of you come up with and agree on).
    brandyj

    Answer by brandyj at 1:23 PM on Nov. 6, 2010

  • You both stepped out. He wants to work it out. Do you? Give yourself time to think about that. YOu need to decide what you want.
    duckigrrl

    Answer by duckigrrl at 1:24 PM on Nov. 6, 2010

  • I did tell him I went out on him too...thats when he wanted to get back together after i TOLD HIM WHAT i DID AND i WAS MOVING ON..THEN HE LOVES ME AGAIN??I LET HIM COME HOME BEEN HERE FOR TWO WEEKS AND HE WONT DROP WHAT I DID..EVERYDAY IS A FIGHT IM SO LOST!
    mommyoffive1983

    Comment by mommyoffive1983 (original poster) at 1:37 PM on Nov. 6, 2010

  • Its done...he only wants to love you so he can hold your "moving on" against you...I would say Laters and really MOVE ON....He will continue to think it is ok to sleep with his sons mom because their is still a relationship there...sorry but you really need to move forward with you life or you will never be comfortable
    4_28_bbboy

    Answer by 4_28_bbboy at 1:42 PM on Nov. 6, 2010

  • or happy....
    4_28_bbboy

    Answer by 4_28_bbboy at 1:43 PM on Nov. 6, 2010

  • So he cheated and then you turned to another man, and then he came back. It sounds like a lifetime movie. I think it is time to step back from your marriage and your relationship with the other man. Both are no good IMO. Your husband has blurry boundaries and the second man is has no respect for marriage vows. Get the drama out of your life and then evaluate your own part in it when you have a quiet time to think. It could be that you are choosing the wrong sort of man to be with.
    lilangilyn

    Answer by lilangilyn at 2:08 PM on Nov. 6, 2010

  • I suspect that moving forward with your dh will be quite difficult. He will have to see and talk to this woman for the rest of their lives. Every time he goes to drop the kids off and he's late you'll wonder if they're in bed! I am usually a "work it out" kind of girl, but in this situation I would have to just walk away. And the fact you found someone so quickly to lean on during this time is an indicator that maybe you should move on as well.
    Austinsmom35

    Answer by Austinsmom35 at 2:29 PM on Nov. 6, 2010

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