Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Me and my fiancee' fight all the time and he calls me name and say its cause of me why he does it, i dont understand why men blame you for their wrong doing?

Answer Question
 
Mrs.Stancil

Asked by Mrs.Stancil at 12:24 AM on Nov. 7, 2010 in Relationships

Level 5 (65 Credits)
Answers (11)
  • im sorry. get counseling before you get married or your marriage will be hell. Believe me, i know
    meagan678

    Answer by meagan678 at 12:25 AM on Nov. 7, 2010

  • why is he still your fiancee? if he's treating you this way now it won't change and may get worse. Get out now.
    bonn777

    Answer by bonn777 at 12:33 AM on Nov. 7, 2010

  • not all men are like that. Either get premarital counseling or kick his ass to the curb
    stressedmomma13

    Answer by stressedmomma13 at 12:57 AM on Nov. 7, 2010

  • And you had a kid with him. wow. Real men dont treat their woman like dirt.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:11 AM on Nov. 7, 2010

  • Sweetheart I can tell you EXACTLY why men do it. I've been down that road... It is because they are INSECURE! As soon as you show him that it doesnt hurt you because you are who you are and you are PROUD of that it will end and he will love you like he's never loved you before :)
    MrsBaldwin

    Answer by MrsBaldwin at 1:23 AM on Nov. 7, 2010

  • My DH had a bad temper,he didn't call me names,yell at me but he would hit thing,and brake things.He had to show me he changed be for I would even consider marriage.He had to be able to control him self for a year.He did to,he still gets mad but he dosn't hit things yell brake thing.I wasn't going to raise a child with him having a temper like that.A real man controls himself,and not act a fool.It is the same for a women too.So I would tell him ether get your shit together if not I am done.Do you really want to live the rest of your life going though this?My DH changed because deep down he wanted to,I didn't do it. You can't change anybody.But you can let them no you worth more and don't deserve that shit.Good luck
    bucky77

    Answer by bucky77 at 2:08 AM on Nov. 7, 2010

  • Oh honey, not good - this is emotional abuse !! Agree with the other posts - get counseling, or you are in for living hell, if you aren't there already ! Mine got me so far down at one point from everything being "my fault" that I almost committed suicide. It's not worth it !!! If he won't go to counseling, get out and move on !
    JustMyOpinion22

    Answer by JustMyOpinion22 at 7:11 AM on Nov. 7, 2010

  • I am going through this. it is a nightmare and pure torchure. It makes me depressed but I have begun to try to separate "my life" from our "relationship". It allows me to feel happiness when I am away from him instead of dragging it with me. I am literally 2 different people right now. He got very pissed at me 5 times yesterday. For nothing at all. Once I had asked him to help me with something a few times and he flipped out. He cussed me in front of his parents and follwed me around staring at me. I tried to apologize (even though I wasn't wrong) and he still went on forever. Ranting and cussing. I know I didn't deserve it. I do know I will be leaving unless this changes. Right now is a bad time though. I don't know if I have advice for you. I'd say to not put up with it but that has backfired on me and made it worse before. I feel very lost and very lonely right now.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:54 AM on Nov. 7, 2010

  • You deserve so much better than this. Think of yourself and rethink staying with this guy.
    elizabr

    Answer by elizabr at 10:53 AM on Nov. 7, 2010

  • when they blame the other for the problems then expect that for the rest of your relationship period...it is a form of habitual controlling and once you are married it gets even worse...I would think really mong and hard before putting a ring on my finger for a man like that...no way Jose!
    4_28_bbboy

    Answer by 4_28_bbboy at 3:40 PM on Nov. 7, 2010

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.
close Join now to connect to
other members!
Connect with Facebook or Sign Up Using Email

Already Joined? LOG IN