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Do you think I'm selfish?

I'm a stay at home mom to my 14 month old DS. He is(and has been since birth) on a routine. He takes a nap every day from 12 - 3 and goes to bed every night at 7:30. When he is late for either of these two he becomes whiney and, I do my best to make sure he goes down on time. Well, the holidays are coming up and my mom expects me to be at her house. I've explained to her that we will be there when we can, which is not blowing over so well. She says I'm selfish because I won't be there when she says to be....I'm a 30 year old woman, not a child. Anyway, just wondering what your thoughts are.

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Asked by Iluvmyseptboy at 12:51 PM on Nov. 7, 2010 in General Parenting

Level 3 (17 Credits)
Answers (16)
  • Do what is best for you and don't worry about the rest selfish would be if you went and did what sh said to the detriment of your child and sanity. You as the momma know whats best

    Answer by pinkdragon36 at 12:54 PM on Nov. 7, 2010

  • What about bringing a pack and play or something like that so he can sleep at her place?

    Answer by juliawerre at 12:54 PM on Nov. 7, 2010

  • are not being selfish at all....I don't know why she can't understand that you have a little boy who is on a schedule (as are alot of babies) and you'll be there as soon as you can...I think she's being a little selfish and not thinking about you or her grandson...she needs to be a little more understanding. Do whats best for your DS...thats your main job...if you don't, who will?

    Answer by waleb1002 at 12:54 PM on Nov. 7, 2010

  • I don't think it's selfish. Just weird. I guess my kids have always gone with the flow. Where we are that's where they nap. My LO will just go to Grandma's and nap. If you were to go on vacation do you cancel because of fear of DS's schedule?

    Answer by Iluvmy5 at 1:05 PM on Nov. 7, 2010

  • My thoughts are that you are doing what is best for your son, and your mom is only seeing her own perspective and is trying to manipulate you through her disapproval......the best thing to do is to ignore her disapproval and stick to your decision.....don't try to explain yourself because she doesn't want to understand, she wants to get her own kind and loving in your words, and get there when you get there.....she'll get over it.....

    Answer by Anna92464 at 1:37 PM on Nov. 7, 2010

  • I always got the kids used to a pack and play so they could sleep in it when we were visiting realtives who lived hours away. You might want to get the baby used to something like that if you have to travel quite a distance. If they are close by I would absolutely visit around your baby's schedule. Then everyone is happy and well rested. The holidays are stressful enough without having a tired little one. GL

    Answer by elizabr at 2:11 PM on Nov. 7, 2010

  • I dont think that you are selfish.

    Answer by LiLJeni at 2:36 PM on Nov. 7, 2010

  • I don't think you are selfish, but I also don't dictate my life around a nap schedule. If my child needs to nap, he can nap at home, in the car, or even at grandma's house. With a 7:30 bedtime are you really going to make sure you are home by then, even on Christmas? It's a time to enjoy being OUT WITH FAMILY imo.


    Answer by KairisMama at 2:48 PM on Nov. 7, 2010

  • So your DS will wake up at 3. You'll go to moms and get there at what- 3:30, 4ish? Okay, so will you be leaving by 6:30-7ish to get home for bedtime? Is the plan to only spend 2 to 2 1/2 hours with the family on Christmas Day? If you really are THAT strict on schedule, that is what I am assuming the plan is. Sorry, but I can understand your mom being a little upset if you only plan to spend a small amount of time with her on Christmas Day due to a sleeping schedule.


    Answer by Anonymous at 2:59 PM on Nov. 7, 2010

  • I agree with the Anon poster above me.

    Answer by aliceinalgonac at 5:01 PM on Nov. 7, 2010

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