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How do you feel about parents who ditch their kids part two

The reason I ask is because alot of us were left without medical records or even a clue to where we came from and I have a lump in my breast and no answers. I ask this question because there are a lot of out there with nothing how do other people who are adopted feel about it?


Asked by pinkdragon36 at 2:33 PM on Nov. 7, 2010 in Adoption

Level 40 (117,668 Credits)
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Answers (7)
  • tyfry, there is a medical history form that is filled out at relinquishment. The problem is that young people are usually healthy and their medical problems don't show up unitl later. I myself developed type 1 diabetes when I had my twins 6 years after I relinquished. I was able to inform my son's amom because we had an open adoption.

    Answer by onethentwins at 2:47 PM on Nov. 7, 2010

  • I am a birth mom. I have tried to contact my birth child's adoptive mother for some time now to give them an update in family history. She is 3 and her 6 year old full brother just had a non-cancerous lump removed form his testicular. She refuses to respond to me and I am pretty sure she is not even opening my letters or reading my emails. So it's not always the Birth parents... Don't get me wrong. My Birth child has excellent parents but they are not thinking their child's best interest. They think they are. But they aren't.

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:37 PM on Nov. 7, 2010

  • I think ALL children that are put up for adoption should come with a medical file for cases like yours. I don't think, most, families "ditch" their children. You dont' know the situation the parents were in at the time. My friend just found her biological mom and the mom wants nothing to do with her, at this point. She is afraid of what her other kids will think of her for giving up their sister for adoption. She did get a letter from her Mother and a medical history. My friend was upset at first but her Mother did leave it open for future communication and has it in her will that she has another child and how to get in touch with her. My friend knows why her mother gave her up for adoption and knows a little about her bio family and she is happy with that. She does not feel "ditched" or angry at her bio family either.

    Answer by tyfry7496 at 2:36 PM on Nov. 7, 2010

  • My brother was old enough to see what happened they told him there was pizza and they left he had our records unsealed and their was nothing there. They left us in the social services and if the janitor had not come by me and my two six month old sisters and my then six year old brother would have been in that lobby over the weekend.

    Comment by pinkdragon36 (original poster) at 2:40 PM on Nov. 7, 2010

  • first anon the janitor not my brother told the story to social servises when they came to get us. He was just there

    Comment by pinkdragon36 (original poster) at 2:50 PM on Nov. 7, 2010

  • My son has cardiac issues since birth. His mom had a history of "anxiety", for which she took Xanax (not to excess.) About 3 years ago, right after my son had neurosurgery for another matter, his first mom's parents got in touch with me to let me know she was having cardiac issues, too. Turns out the "anxiety" some MD diagnosed her with was cardiac related, not anxiety! She had to have an ablation, and is doing much better , although she may need a pacemaker in the future. She is about 28. We have jointly participated in a research program through Children's Hosp. Boston/Harvard University. I am glad to have all of us involved, as her other children are at risk, and so are any children my son may have. Also, her (natural) mom had severe mental illness, and we are all aware the children need to be monitered for symptoms. (my son had hallucinations when he was put on a RX for ADHD) All families benefit from sharing medical info!

    Answer by Heartlight617 at 3:23 PM on Nov. 7, 2010

  • I an not trying ot discredit you. I believe you were abandoned but with all due respect the memories of a terrified 6 year old child can be askew. Do your self a favor and live in the future and not the past. You will never know what your parents were thinking or why they did what they did. Ther is no point in being so angry over something you have no control over. Let them go. Write them of as nothing to you and find your own way.

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:46 PM on Nov. 7, 2010