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how??

how am i suppose to talk about this upcoming deployment if i cant stop crying with the thought of it. i mean bawling not just little tears. i was reading some information from military one source about deployments and kids and stuff and it alone makes me cry. i just dont know what to do. everytime dh says something about it i cry knowing he is going away and i really dont know how to tell our 3 year old and our 18 month old. please help me!!!!!!!

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 9:32 PM on Nov. 1, 2008 in Relationships

Answers (9)
  • It's really ok to be sad, who wouldnt be!! You should get together with some other military wives on here or in your area I hear they are what gets eachother through!! Also about telling your kids.... just tell them that their daddy is going to be gone for awhile cause he is going to be a hero and make our country and better place!!
    scaredmommy08

    Answer by scaredmommy08 at 9:37 PM on Nov. 1, 2008

  • I have no answer for your problem but I wanted to just take the time to say thank you to you and your family. I realize what you all all giving up so he can go and defend our freedom. I will keep you and your family in my thoughts and prayers. THANKS FOR ALL YALL GIVE FOR THE UNITED STATES......
    ms_tee2007

    Answer by ms_tee2007 at 9:42 PM on Nov. 1, 2008

  • You are a strong woman, you can make it through. I hope you also have some family and/or some good friends surround yourself with them as well for support. Try to spend the time with your husband happily(easier said than done I know)but do try.
    Apr1l

    Answer by Apr1l at 9:46 PM on Nov. 1, 2008

  • Girl I don't know what to tell you because truthfully I don't think that I would be able to handle it. My husband use to talk about joining the military, but has a bad knee so he never did.. but thank god, because I don't know if I could handle him being gone.. But just like ms tee said.. Thank you.. without families like you where would our country be. I am a big supporter of the Military, but I couldn't imagine my children not having their father around. So I can completely understand why you are so hurt.. but I would suggest to surround yourself with friends and family.. because they always seem to help me pull through hard times.
    atjm0919

    Answer by atjm0919 at 10:17 PM on Nov. 1, 2008

  • there is NOTHING that can make it easier or make the impact less. honestly...it is one of the hardest damn things you will ever have to go through. its best to grieve while hes here, then your womanly and motherly instincts will come in without you even knowing it and you will get through it. its going to be hard with your 18 month old because babies dont understand, but i would completely honest with your 3 year old. daddy is like a super hero going away to defend our country and he will be home as soon as he can. thank you so much for your families service, my heart goes out to you all!
    Aurorasmom

    Answer by Aurorasmom at 10:22 PM on Nov. 1, 2008

  • You're a lot stronger than you're giving yourself credit for. I've never been throught anything like this so I'm not going to say, "I know how you feel", but I feel FOR you and I'm sure it's hard. But you have your kids to help you get through it. Also, I would like to thank your husband and all the men and women who defend our country everyday.
    LovingParent08

    Answer by LovingParent08 at 10:30 PM on Nov. 1, 2008

  • If you need to talk please pm me. Hubby deployed 1 year & i had to handle my now 4 year old stepson. Its not gonna be easy hun but with someone to talk to whos been through it hopefully it may help pass the time. Civilian friends never really understand, but military wives always do :)
    fire_girl7281

    Answer by fire_girl7281 at 10:30 PM on Nov. 1, 2008

  • You're not alone. my dh is leaving very soon also, and i have a 19 month old and a 13 week old. i've been through a deployment, but not with kids before. Tell your dh to call AS SOON as he gets a chance to, or to email. trust me, you'll probly be a mess until you get that first email or phone call, then start to feel better, and instincts will kick in and you'll be fine. if you're anything like me, you'll keep the computer on and refresh your inbox every time you pass the computer, (which you'll make it a point to do it every 5 minutes) and that phone will be glued to your body like never before. lol, you know you're a military wife when you take a shower with your phone! LOL. I dont' know when your hubby is leaving, but if it's soon, like mine, then feel free to pm me if you ever need a few words of encouragment. you'll find something to keep you busy the whole time!
    armywife43

    Answer by armywife43 at 10:54 PM on Nov. 1, 2008

  • My husband is in Okinawa on his LAST TOUR before retirement in 18 months. I am sooo glad! He has been gone since February. We have been together for 18 years. We have been physically together for about half that.

    Deployments, TDYs, Unaccompanieds (my hub is on that), Remotes; it's all part of the military life. It's not easy. In order to make it easier on the kids, contact your family support center. They normally have programs to help make the transition easier. They also have fyi materials for you to give you suggestions on what to tell your kids when the parent is gone. Use everything available to you and don't be afraid to ask for help!
    SkyeGirl

    Answer by SkyeGirl at 11:57 PM on Nov. 1, 2008

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