Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

1 Bump

Is it common to obsess over paternal dad of an abortion, after the abortion?

I decided to go for therapy since I am serious obsessing over the paternal dad of an abortion that I had two years ago. I work with the guy, and the guy is turning me away (which is making things worse). I am going to post-abortion counseling. I was gone from the job for two years because of the drama. Now, I'm back working at at the same place. I cannot think straight or concentrate because of him. I'm going for professional help. I was told that I'm still grieving, and seeing him is making things worse.

It's like everything is resurfacing again. Am I normal to feel this way?

Answer Question

Asked by BlueSaphire at 9:20 PM on Nov. 8, 2010 in Health

Level 21 (11,698 Credits)
Answers (9)
  • its quite normal. you will always see him in that light no matter what. i am glad you are going for counseling good for you. hang in there.

    Answer by lambdarose at 9:25 PM on Nov. 8, 2010

  • im sure it is, but youre about to enter a heated pro choice/pro life debate if you post this on the answers section of cafemom... you should join a group and ask there

    Answer by pookipoo at 9:25 PM on Nov. 8, 2010

  • You sure are normal. You are questioning the unknown, totally normal. Glad to hear you are in theraphy, very smart of you. Wishing you all the best.

    Answer by QandA at 9:30 PM on Nov. 8, 2010

  • Well, at least you are self-aware enough to admit you need counseling. So many people need to go but don't, denying that they need it.

    Answer by mhaney03 at 9:33 PM on Nov. 8, 2010

  • I had the same problem, more or less, and I had to realize that i will grief always because it didn't matter who the father was... The Mother was me.

    Answer by 1htmma4624 at 9:33 PM on Nov. 8, 2010

  • My issue is that I had to pay a huge price (the death of my baby), including postponing my life for two years (and the financial drain of those two years). This is a lot to ask of a woman. I feel that the treatment from the paternal dad is very demeaning for me as a human being. I couldn't take it any more. The obsession was getting way out of hand.

    Comment by BlueSaphire (original poster) at 9:36 PM on Nov. 8, 2010

  • Im not sure but you are getting help and that a start in the right direction

    Answer by HomeAlone45 at 9:41 PM on Nov. 8, 2010

  • I hope your counselor helps with your selfishness.

    Answer by SaraP1989 at 9:51 PM on Nov. 8, 2010

  • yes

    Answer by san78 at 1:45 PM on Nov. 9, 2010

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.